What’s It Like Being Submissive During Sex?

Most of us are at least a little curious about what it is like to submit to somebody during sex. This could be simply taking a more submissive role in the bedroom or even becoming a slave to a master or mistress. Either way, we want to know more about this kinky experience.

Woman wearing a French Maid outfit dominate! Dominatrix sexy lingerie concept. Studio shot. Isolated on white background.

If you have never tried it before, you might want to find out what it is like to be submissive during sex before you experience it. It can help you set your expectations and know what to expect when you do, which can really help to put you at ease.

You put your focus elsewhere

When it comes to sex, we constantly want to try new things. We want to spice things up and make sex as exciting as possible. However, this puts a lot of pressure on us. Struggling to constantly come up with fresh ideas can really make it tough on you, especially if you are trying to think of new things on the spot.

Those who submit to their partner will find that this pressure is taken off of them. The dominant partner takes control of the situation, and so the need to come up with fresh ideas is gone. You can focus instead on other things.

If your partner simply prefers to take control by being on top during sex, you don’t have to think about choosing the position. They will and this means you can use your hands to touch yourself or your partner. Your focus becomes the pleasure you feel.

If it is more extreme submission, such as giving yourself over to a dominatrix, they will tell you what you need to do. All you have to do is follow their command. Your focus is on doing what they tell you and not on coming up with fresh ideas. It is really freeing to fuck this way.

Safe environment for sex

When there is a clear dominant and submissive partner in your relationship, you’ll find that you have a safe environment to talk about sex. Often sex is easier, as you will have discussed your preferences in the bedroom.

If you have a kinky idea you want to share, you can do so. Best of all, the chances are that you’ll be able to try it. Your partner will help you explore it however they can, and you’ll know that, if it doesn’t work for you, there isn’t the pressure to put up with it. You can stop the fun whenever you feel the need to.

This is especially true with relationships with dominatrixes. You’ll establish a safe word before you fuck or try your kinky activities. The safe word gives you a way to stop the action if it gets a little too intense, or you simply don’t like what is happening. You are safe to use the word, as you’ll have built a relationship of trust with them.

The trust means that they’ll stop when you use the word. You can then talk about why you used the word. Was it simply that you didn’t enjoy the sex act, or is it that things got a little too intense and you just need a break? Yes, it is perfectly acceptable to use the safe word if you just need a moment. You can pick up again afterwards, as long as you talk to your dominant first.

Aftercare

If you have been spending time with a dominatrix, you’ll have experienced something known as aftercare. This is when you have finished with your submissive session and need to bring yourself back down from the high.

Some subs will find that they are shaking over how intense it was, or that they are having trouble focusing from the sheer amount of pleasure. A good dominatrix will use aftercare to help bring you back. This usually involves gentle touches and attention.

You will be rewarded for what you have done, and this moment after the session is very important. It makes you feel safe and, best of all, appreciated. The reward shows that you have done a good job and that your mistress or master is pleased.

It’s incredibly calming and brings you closer to your partner. It can really put you at ease, and is also the perfect time to discuss what happened. You can tell them what you liked and what you didn’t enjoy without having to worry about the reaction.

Are you submissive, dominant, or switch?

Most people will find that they tend to be one of three things in the bedroom. They could be dominant and love taking control. They might be submissive and want to give control and trust to their partner. Or they could be a switch, meaning that they can be either dominant or submissive, depending on the situation.

Do you class yourself as one of these? If so, we want to hear from you! Let us know what you think by leaving a comment in the box below. You could even vote in the poll if you’d prefer, so let us know if you are dominant, submissive, or switch!

Lara Mills
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Lara Mills

Lara Mills is a writer who has four years of sex industry expertise behind her. Since she entered the adult industry, she has worked on the Escort Advertising forums, before moving into her current role three years ago.

Since then she has gained a fine reputation with her blogs on sex advice, sexual health and amusing news stories from around the globe. She is also a campaigner for the rights of sex workers from all over the world.

In her spare time, Lara keeps herself active by going running, and is something of a film buff. She also loves to go travelling.
Lara Mills
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