We get it – you want to be amazing in bed. You want to leave women moaning and groaning on the bed, begging for more, and talking to all of their friends about what a fantastic fuck you are.
However, sometimes when you go searching for advice, you’ll read something and think “YES! This is exactly what I need!” and then when you try it in bed, you feel like a champion… even though your partner clearly didn’t enjoy it as much as you did.
We take a look at some of the sex tips that you really need to stop following, and what you should be doing instead.
Ramming speed!
This is something we women, and some men, have to put up with a lot. When it comes to foreplay, you aren’t always sure what to do. Some things work for some and might not work for others, so you have to experiment.
However, the standard move for guys is to shove as many fingers in as you can and thrust them in and out as though you are pressing a broken elevator button in the hopes of getting a response. More often than not, this just doesn’t work, so please stop it!
First things first, slow and steady wins the race. Jabbing your fingers in there are quickly as possible won’t get us to orgasm faster. If anything, it’ll just turn us off and leave us unsatisfied later… which definitely isn’t what you want!
We really shouldn’t have to say this next bit, but our pussy is not a glove. You don’t want to wear us on your hand, and if you do want to try fisting you should really talk to us about it first, instead of trying to force yourself inside us. For whatever reason, many believe that more fingers is better for us, but actually, it stops you from getting as deep, and so you can’t give us the right kind of attention on our g-spot.
The best thing to do, instead of trying to insert your entire arm into our pussy and ramming it in over and over again, is to use one of two fingers and slowly slide them in. Use a “come hither” motion with your fingers to find the g-spot and gently rub there. This will get us screaming a lot quicker than trying to turn us into Kermit the frog.
Spitting and blowing? No thank you!
It happens in porn movies – the woman isn’t wet enough, so the guy will spit to get her there. He’ll either spit into his hand and rub it in or just aim at her pussy and put his saliva there. Sometimes, the guy will even blow on her, apparently because it is a huge turn on.
If you are thinking about spitting onto your partner’s pussy to make her wetter – don’t. Stop being lazy. If she isn’t wet enough, guess what you need to do? Instead of thinking “I want to fuck her and I want to do it now”, think “I want this to feel amazing for her too” and work towards that.
Don’t skimp on the foreplay. Foreplay is a big part of sex, and while you might be ready at the first sign of a naked woman, we women take a little longer to get there. A slow and sensual massage can be a great way to help relax us, and oral will allow you to get us to orgasm before we get down to business.
The result? We have an orgasm before we have sex and you get a nice and wet pussy to dive into. It’s a win/win situation, and we genuinely can’t think of anything bad about doing it like this!
As for blowing on her, unless you want her to immediately scratch at her crotch, we advise you don’t bother. It isn’t sexy, and it actually just makes us really itchy, which is a huge turn off for both you and your partner.
Leave letters and numbers out of it
Once upon a time, an apparent sex god went on record saying that using numbers and letters in the bedroom is a great way to get your partner to orgasm. With oral sex, you should go through the alphabet with your tongue on her clit to vary it up a bit, while thrusting in the figure out will have her screaming in orgasm.
Please PLEASE leave letters and numbers out of the bedroom. Yes, variety is nice, but more often than not you will spend so much time concentrating on the actual pattern you are drawing instead of what you are meant to be doing – which is fucking us to orgasm.
You can vary oral sex without going through the alphabet, and your partner can really help with that. Experiment when you’re down there, licking her up and down, left and right, round and round, until she starts to really moan and groan. When she is doing that, you know that you have hit a good rhythm for her, so keep at it.
Sorry to disappoint you, but the figure eight technique actually does nothing for us. If anything, it just feels uncomfortable. Instead of trying this odd thrusting technique, why not try a new position instead? It will give you the chance to change the angle of your thrusts and maybe even put your partner in the driving seat, which she will love.
Don’t act like you’re in a porno!
Sometimes we will find great inspiration in porn films. Okay, they aren’t very accurate of real life sex, but sometimes they’ll give you fantasies or positions that you want to try later on in the bedroom. However, there are some porn things that you should definitely not try to recreate.
The sex talk is one. Erotic conversation in the bedroom is fun, but if you start saying things like “you love taking my cock like that, you sexy minx” we might actually just laugh. Instead, say things plainly. Tell her you’d love to fuck her, or that you want to see her ass in doggy style. It will be a bigger turn for us and you won’t feel ridiculous saying it.
In porn movies it might be perfectly acceptable to rip the star’s clothes and panties off before they start fucking, but their costumes are usually all paid for as part of the movie. Your partner’s aren’t, so don’t even think about ripping them off unless she asks you to. Instead, admire the way her sexy lingerie hugs her body and how hot she looks in it, before pulling her panties to the side so you can fuck her.
Have you got some better sex tips for others to try, or have you found some that should be avoided at all costs? You can let us know by visiting the Escort Ireland forum, or by commenting in the box below. Are these tips helpful for you, or do you have some better advice for others to try and spice up their sex lives with?
Since then she has gained a fine reputation with her blogs on sex advice, sexual health and amusing news stories from around the globe. She is also a campaigner for the rights of sex workers from all over the world.
In her spare time, Lara keeps herself active by going running, and is something of a film buff. She also loves to go travelling.
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