Sex toys are everywhere. No matter where you go or where you look, people are talking about what toys they use and how amazing they are… but first time users might not agree.
Here on the Escort Ireland blog I take a look at what buying your first sex toy is really like, and just what you should be looking for in your very first toy.
Buying the first toy
When I bought my first sex toy I had just come out of a relationship. I was feeling lonely and hadn’t had sex in so long that I felt incredibly awkward and completely unsexy in bed.
A girl friend of mine decided that we should go shopping. For us, that meant eating the most delicious chocolate we could find and heading to the local Ann Summers shop so my very sexually active friend could look at the latest products.
I was simply standing around looking at the more unusual items (why would someone want to put a daffodil up there?) when a sales assistant approached me. She asked if I needed help and before I could say no, my friend appeared and said that I needed a new best friend.
“I know what you need” said the assistant as she picked a vibrator from the shelf. “Perfect for beginners, and its waterproof!”
It may feel embarrassing to talk to the assistants in the shops about what it is you are looking for, but in my experience they have been very helpful. Yes, they want to get a sale, but they also want you to walk out with the right toy. They are mostly women, and they know what it can be like to be left unsatisfied!
First time use
I didn’t get around to using it for a long time. Around a month or two later, I was feeling particularly horny when I remembered the vibrator sitting in the drawer.
Taking it out of the box for the first time was terrifying. It looked like the least attractive thing in the world, and the very thought of sliding it inside me was a huge turn off. Was this really what my best friend had raved about?
Nevertheless, I went through the motions. For around ten minutes I tried to get myself to cum using it and nothing happened. I gave up, deciding that I would never ever touch it again.
Of course, the second time it worked a treat… and it was all because I had removed my expectations.
I was tense and nervous the first time I used it. I didn’t want it to work because of my stigma about sex toys, and so it didn’t. The second time, when I fully expected it not to work and so relaxed a little more, it worked beautifully.
What to look out for
There are some important things you should look out for when buying sex toys for the first time. Don’t just go for the latest one you have seen advertised because people have raved about it. What works for them might not work for you.
You should also check the prices of things. My first toy cost me €30, including batteries. You don’t need to spend a fortune on your first sex toy, and you don’t need to go for the brand. It might not be right for you, and it may also be a lot more money than you are willing to part with, so choose wisely.
Who is it for? If it is for your partner, they should really go with you shopping to make sure it is something they like. Likewise if it is a toy you can both use. You want something that will bring pleasure to you both, not just to them.
If your toy is going to be for your use and your use alone, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Explain to the shop assistants what you are hoping for, and what your fears about the toys are. If you are intimidated by the size of the toys, they will find you something smaller and more discreet to buy.
Lube and batteries not included!
It’s horrible isn’t it? You buy a new gadget and get home only to find that you can’t use it because batteries were not included. It may sound ridiculous, but you need to remember the same with sex toys.
Luckily, wherever you buy your sex toys from, you can usually buy batteries and lube too. Go for a lube that will work well with your toy, and make sure you take the batteries out after each use to stop them from corroding in the toy.
You should also look at how you are going to keep your new toy clean. Many shops sell specialised wipes you can use to freshen up yourself and the toy, and some toys have instructions to let you know the best way to clean them. Don’t use Fairy liquid as a replacement!
Have you ever bought or used a sex toy? What was your first time like? Share it with me in the comments below, or check out what others are saying on the Escort Ireland forum.
Since then she has gained a fine reputation with her blogs on sex advice, sexual health and amusing news stories from around the globe. She is also a campaigner for the rights of sex workers from all over the world.
In her spare time, Lara keeps herself active by going running, and is something of a film buff. She also loves to go travelling.
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