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I met Iris babe about three weeks ago definitely my wildest fantsy came true as a single meeting I totally recommend definitely the duo is a must do.

:)I walked into Ann Summers
today-
"I'd like to return the wifes dildo please" I said "swap it for a bigger one,"
Am sorry sir but there's no exchange or return on dildoes" said the assistant ...

I was chatting up a girl in the pub before when this bloke came over.
You do realise this is my girlfriend don't you
wanna take it outside?

Of course I do am hardly gonna try and fuck her in...

The wife suggested we swap roles in bed tonight but I'm not keen.

I don't think I could fuck without moving.

It probably is a place for dirty old men but ive been a Dirty old man since i was 10 ;-)

My best friend dared me to take a shit on an electrified train track.

that's the last time I put my arse on the line.

my wife just called me.
she said three of the girls in the office have just recieved some flowers for valentines Day,they are absoluetly gorgeous.
I said "that's probably why they've recieved...

what do you call a train that dosen't stop at your station?
Thomas the Bastard!!

several years ago my wife came to me one night and said we should watch a porno together.
Excited I rushed to the video store and rented the nastiest-sounding title I could find
I rushed home...

never mind looking for it back best ask her to work for it;-)

I had a quiet New Year's Eve.
Nothing to drink. tv switched off by 8.00pm.then bed with a long sex session to end the night.

I fucking hate prison.

yes those are for sure stil selling wel again old classic's

kourous has always been my favorite there was a simular thread before about aftershave's i never mentioned this one before but i find most women really loved the kourous..its an old one now but...

thats called the cleaning of the Bag feargal
.;-)

All my missus got me for christmas was a fucking clockwork radio.

I asked her."is this a wind up?"

my neighbour obviously does'nt watch porn..She asked me to come fix sink.I have been here for an hour and I am still fixing the Damm sink.

there was an earthqake at the christian brothers monastery and it was leveled all fifty brothers were transported to heaven at the one time at the pearly gates st peter said lets go through the entry...

your already paying for it on your tax already and as for being a crim thats nonsense end of

I was staring over the fence at the neighbour's arse today until the wife appeared.
Engoying the view?" she said icily.
"what? I said "oh right I just thought jenny had the same bikini bottoms as...

I can't believe how strong the winds were last night.
I nipped out to get my wife some milk and got blown into the fucking pub.

classic :-D

congratulations Emma sweet well done girl :-)

Happy Birthday Alexa hope you had a good one

they say that if a girl is playing with her hair then she means she is horny and looking for sex.
this is very worrying as the old lady across from me keeps playing with the ones on the mole on her...

a man who took an Airline company to court after his luggage went missing he has lost his case.