Gort...

[Mousey]

In the Book of Genesis, somewhere toward the front, it reads:

"... and God saw everything that he had made, and it was good. And the evening and the morning were the eighth day. Then God went for a few pints and woke up the next morning needing a tremendous beer shite. Perching his divine arse over the Earth, he, in his wisdom, let his holy turd fall where it may, saying 'Get thee behind me!' And his plops did fall to the Earth and where they landed, the earth was fruitful and did multiply.

Then the Lord sayeth, 'Who fucking used the last of the bog roll and did not replaceth it? I am an angry God!' For lack of immediate relief, the Lord did wipeth his bunghole upon the Earth, leaving a dingleberry behind, and lo, men named the place Gort, which in their tongue means 'an awful hole'.

Here endeth the lesson."