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--CHUCK NORRIS - It's The Facts, Jack!--
Love does not hurt. Chuck Norris does.
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Chuck Norris once sued Burger King after they refused to put razor wire in his Whopper Jr, insisting that that actually is "his" way.
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Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
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Maslow's theory of higher needs does not apply to Chuck Norris. He only has two needs: killing people and finding people to kill.
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Most people know that Descarte said, "I think, therefore I am." What most people don't know is that that quote continues, "...afraid of Chuck Norris."
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When Arnold says the line "I'll be back" in the first Terminator movie it is implied that is he going to ask Chuck Norris for help.
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After taking a steroids test doctors informed Chuck Norris that he had tested positive. He laughed upon receiving this information, and said "of course my urine tested positive, what do you think they make steroids from?"
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Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
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when cuck norris goes swimming he doesnt get wet the water gets chuck norrissed
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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
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