If you are serious about it, can I recommend you listen to some lectures by Alan Watts.
You can try either podcaasts or torrents.
I had a passing interest in Buddhism when I was going through a rough patch, and went to a few different meditation sessions, (although these were more about yoga than buddhism), meetings and lectures.
Basically, after about 12 months of reading into the various forms of Buddhism, and meditating to try to still my mind, I began to get the sneaking feeling that all this was about as much use as going to see a shrink, which I had hitherto done for a whole year. Then, one day, which started out much like any other, I had a major revalation and made a huge breakthrough.
Basically, my "satori" (
Satori - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia) occured after hearing the following story, which takes the form of a Zen Koan, loosely speaking, in so far as it is supposed to enlighten (s)he who hears it.
[One day, a young monk was returning to his monestry. As he walked, he was very perplexed and consumed with his thoughts. He lost his way, and came to a river that was swollen from recent rains. He walked along the river bank and found no safe place to cross, then he turned back on himself and walked in the other direction. For many hours he sought a safe place to cross, finally sitting down in hopeless desperation. After a short time, he espied a Zen Master walking along the opposite bank.
The young monk called out, "Oh wise and virtuous one, can you tell me how I can get to the other side of the river?" The master responded, without looking up or breaking his stride, "You are already on the other side." On hearing this, the young monk was instantly enlightened.]
The moment I read this Koan, I said, "Fuck a bunch of Buddhism." This was my major revalation, I realised that Buddhism was not for me. I knew that if I had been the young monk, I would have picked up a bunch of stones and thrown them one after another at the old master, while running along the bank and shouting, "I'm on this side, you cocksucker, this fucking side!"
Some might see this as a year wasted. I had spent a whole year looking into Buddhism only to find that it wasn't for me. But I counted my blessings, as I'm aware that there are many, (Westeners and Orientals alike) who devote their entire lives to the pursuit of enlightenment to no avail.
Jesus loves you.
Remember, you heard it hear first.