It's not easy being a penis, you have a head with no brain , an eye that can't see, you have to hang around with two nuts, you live around the corner from an asshole and your best friend is a cunt!!
It's not easy being a penis, you have a head with no brain , an eye that can't see, you have to hang around with two nuts, you live around the corner from an asshole and your best friend is a cunt!!
Barney Rubble (25-02-19), BarryD (27-03-22), beautyaddict (05-03-19), FranknStein (25-02-19), irishjp (09-03-20), jekyl69 (08-04-20)
Not bad, my crap joke is better than your crap joke if I do say so myself 😜
beautyaddict (05-03-19)
What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?
Beat it. We’re closed
Mrbean76 (09-03-20), yourehighered (22-08-21)
Whats Green and smells of Pork....Kermit the frog Finger.
Kisses Katie
irishjp (09-03-20), Mrbean76 (09-03-20), yourehighered (22-08-21)
What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose?
Full!
what do you call a fly without wings?
a walk...
for as long as i can remember, i always wanted to be a gangster ....
lildick (14-04-23), Mrbean76 (10-03-20), yourehighered (22-08-21)
Do you know how heavy a red hot chilli pepper is?
Give it a weigh, give it a weigh, give it a weigh now...
Mrbean76 (10-03-20), Stephanie (09-04-20), yourehighered (22-08-21)
Never teach a wolf to meditate, it will become aware wolf!!
We have two lives , the second begins when we realise we only have one .....
I may have posted this myself already!!??
105 year old ladies advice to us all.
"For better digestion I drink beer. Incase of appetite loss I drink white wine. Incase of low blood pressure I drink red wine. Incase of high blood pressure I drink scotch. When in have a cold I drink Schnapps"
" When do you drink water?"
" I've never been that sick!!"
We have two lives , the second begins when we realise we only have one .....
A petrol station owner in Dublin was trying to increase his sales, so he put up a sign that read, 'Free Sex with Fill-Up!'
Paddy pulled in, filled his tank and asked for his free sex. The owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10.
If he guessed correctly, he would get his free sex.
Paddy guessed 8, and the proprietor said, "You were close. The number was 7. Sorry. No sex this time."
A week later, Paddy, along with his friend Mick, pulled in for another fill-up. Again he asked for his free sex.
The proprietor again gave him the same story, and asked him to guess the correct number.
Paddy guessed 2. The proprietor said, "Sorry, it was 3. You were close, but no free sex this time."
As they were driving away, Mick said to Paddy, "I think that game is rigged and he doesn't really give away free sex at all."
Paddy replied, "No, no, it's genuine enough Mick. My wife won twice last week."
beautyaddict (16-07-20)