I think the point is being missed here. If anyone of you do feel overwhelmingly guilty, I would take Alex's advice and seriously consider your actions.
However, it seems that it is Byrne with the issue, and I don't think any answer you will get from other punters, escorts is going to be right for you. Sounds like it is about time you sat down and had a think without the need for opinions other than your own. The decision is yours, they can try but no one can help you make the right one for you..bar you.
“Nothing is more creative... nor destructive... than a brilliant mind with a purpose.”
― Dan Brown, Inferno