Take The Piss Out Of E-I Staff Game

[Mousey]

Hello, my fellow perverts. I am Mousey. You probably remember me from such side-splitting threads as "You Can't Spell Boooooobies Without The Oooooo"; "Everybody Loves To Hates Chunky Joe", and "Interacting On This Forum Legitimises Online Pimpery".

Anyway, i was trawling through the E-I site there at lunchtime. Now I don't know about you, but I generally go through all the profiles once or twice a month and add what I like to the My Favourite Escorts page (a really handy way of keeping track of the ladies you would most like to visit), and delete those who I don't.

And while my cybernet was cast through the rocky shoals, I found the View Site Leaders page under the Quick Links button. On that page, it lists all the profiles of all the mods and all the E-I staff.

Here are some facts I noticed.


1. There are 5 community moderators - Benny (tool), Doozer (kant spiell), the Doc (geratric), Magic (stupid comps), and Highway (Donegal hey).

2. There is 1 forum moderator - JohnRambo (mankini).

3. There are 3 Administrators - Felicity (ass), Patricia (Mammy), Pauli (WoW teh suXXXOr)

4. There are FOURTEEN Super Moderators. They are:
- Ad Staff
- charlie
- Extreme Nerd
- Gary
- Julia
- Martin Mod
- Natasha
- Nicole
- PeepingTom
- QueenBee
- Racquel
- samlad
- Sarah
- Sophia

Now going on general chit-chat on the boards, it struck me that I actually have no clue what the Admins and the Super Moderators do for a living. I mean, I know E-I has a nice bright office somewhere (at least, I hope it's an office and not a dungeon with everyone chained to radiators) with everyone working at their computers, answering phones, verifying photos, etc, but we don't know who does what. Surely there's got to be a receptionist, for example, but we don't know who it is.

So I wrote down the profuiles of the E-I staff, what they do, and what they probably actually do all day


NAME: Felicity
JOB: ?????????
WHAT SHE ACTUALLY DOES: ??????

NAME: Patricia
JOB: Site Mammy
WHAT SHE ACTUALLY DOES: monitors E-I Paypal account

NAME: Pauli
JOB: Network Guy
WHAT HE ACTUALLY DOES: plays World of Warcraft all day

NAME: Ad Staff
JOB: sets up ads, probably
WHAT S/HE ACTUALLY DOES: answers phones from escorts screaming about delays

NAME: charlie
JOB: ?????????
WHAT S/HE ACTUALLY DOES: ????????????

NAME: Extreme Nerd
JOB: ???????????
WHAT S/HE ACTUALLY DOES: ??????????????

NAME: Gary
JOB: ????????
WHAT HE ACTUALLY DOES: ???????????

NAME: Julia
JOB: Helps out escorts in some way
WHAT SHE ACTUALLY DOES: her nails

NAME: Martin Mod
JOB: ??????????
WHAT HE ACTUALLY DOES: ???????????

NAME: Natasha
JOB: ?????????
WHAT SHE ACTUALLY DOES: ???????????

NAME: Nicole
JOB: Boards
WHAT SHE ACTUALLY DOES: Pouts, plays with own nipples

NAME: PeepingTom
JOB: ???????????
WHAT HE ACTUALLY DOES: ?????????????

NAME: QueenBee
JOB: ???????????
WHAT SHE ACTUALLY DOES: Blabs Inappropriately

NAME: Racquel
JOB: ????????????
WHAT SHE ACTUALLY DOES: ???????????????

NAME: samlad
JOB: Message Boards Manager
WHAT HE ACTUALLY DOES: bans people, waves cock around on Internet

NAME: Sarah
JOB: ???????
WHAT SHE ACTUALLY DOES: ???????????

NAME: Sophia
JOB: ????????
WHAT SHE ACTUALLY DOES: ????????????





Come on everyone (including E-I staff), help us fill in the blanks