in praise of death

[Westsidex]

The thing about sucicide is taht in most cases its a cry for help. Most peopel dont really want to actually die, but there are those that do and unfortunatly either the loved ones who they leave behind dosnt register with them or they just cant face another moment feeling like they do and feel its best for theor loved ones.
Its a very delicate subject and very prevelent in our society
Whats worse is that young children are getting these ideas in their head that there is no way out. Imagine a 9 year old think life is too much and hanging themselves over being bullied(True story) its a terrible waste of human life and potential

The shame of it all is that if they just hung in there even if they had noone to listen to them and really just believed ,they would be still here and not only that but far stronger ppl. Im not saying ppl that commit suicide are weak ppl but they do have an ability to distort a thing ,in their own minds, to the point of it becoming untouchable.

When i was young growing up i had no confidence and never spoke to anyone about things that bothered me. A few things happened in my life that could have caused me to commit suicide but i always believed that no matter what, if you preserve ,youll find a way. The result is i dont even need ppl to talk to about probs now. If things go wrong for me i am able to pull out of shit and get back on track very very fast. Even ppl that know me (and this fuckin irriatates me as its still nice to have ppl to listen even if you dont talk about something) dont even bother half the time if i have bother as they know "he will be fine".

My whole point is we all have shit that happens that could push us over the edge but these are also opportunities to grow and become stronger as ppl. Try to see problems as challenges, as tests and not as some bad light over your life. Two ppl could have the same prob. One kills himself while the other sees it as a challenge. To one it destroys while to the other it motivates. Its the same prob but what causes the outcome is the person interpretation of it.

Westside.

[luther]

. Suicide is bullshit and solves nothing. It is not the answer. Instead it leaves a trail of pain and hurt in its wake. I think it's a most selfish and self obsessed act, so don't try to tell me that the people who do it are too full of pain. The problem is they're so self indulgent that they think they are the only ones who suffer.

Yes it's bullshit.........

No, it's not the answer.......

Yes it leaves a trail od pain and hurt in it's wake........

Is it the most selfish and self obsessed act???

To the people left behind, it would certainly seem that way. To the actual person, no, it's no, infact if it's not a cry for help to them it seems like the only way out and an actual selfless act..........

There's not that cannot be talked through, nothing that cannot be resolved, and everyone at least once in their life goes through the dark night of the soul, some people more than that.

Of course there isn't anything that cannot be talked through etc., provided the person actually talks about it, and has someone to talk to about it. But there in lies the problem. Because this sort of thing is still so taboo in this God damn country young men in particular are still afraid to admit that have a problem, or need help, or just need to talk to someone, and that's where it starts.........

If there is a next life and I meet these people again, I'm gonna kick all of their asses

Perhaps if people took a little less of this attitude when they were alive they might still be...

Wouldn't you rather put your arm around them and ask them why???

Was there anything you could have done to pervent it???

Was there anything anyone could have done to prevent it???

Wouldn't you rather ask them how they may have been helped and saved rather than kicking them in the ass???

[robijntje]

Some guy started this thread giving the impression he wanted to die, and now this thread turned into suicide discussion...

Heads up dude!

[Lucy Chambers]

Some guy started this thread giving the impression he wanted to die, and now this thread turned into suicide discussion...

Heads up dude!

No he did not give the impression he wanted to die. People interpreted his thread in the way they wanted to- as usual. We all read whatever we want to.

[luther]

No he did not give the impression he wanted to die. People interpreted his thread in the way they wanted to- as usual. We all read whatever we want to.

Exactly............

Personally I didn't immediately read the original post like that, but it did go in that direction..........and usually ends in trouble so I won't be posting in it again..........

[Paddii]

Yes it's bullshit.........

No, it's not the answer.......

Yes it leaves a trail od pain and hurt in it's wake........

Is it the most selfish and self obsessed act???

Yes

To the people left behind, it would certainly seem that way. To the actual person, no, it's no, infact if it's not a cry for help to them it seems like the only way out and an actual selfless act..........

Sorry, but this is crap, they're thinking about no one but themselves, otherwise they wouldn't do that to their family and friends. Granted maybe in their own minds, in their state of mind, there is no other recourse and they may think they're being selfless, but there is no logic to this action. Never in this life will I attempt to excuse or condone it.

Of course there isn't anything that cannot be talked through etc., provided the person actually talks about it, and has someone to talk to about it. But there in lies the problem. Because this sort of thing is still so taboo in this God damn country young men in particular are still afraid to admit that have a problem, or need help, or just need to talk to someone, and that's where it starts.........

This is specifically an Irish male problem? There does need to be a change in mindset for a lot of us to be more open and to seek help. There is lots of help out there if it can't be found among family and friends, eg Samaritans.

Perhaps if people took a little less of this attitude when they were alive they might still be...

Wouldn't you rather put your arm around them and ask them why???

Was there anything you could have done to pervent it???

Was there anything anyone could have done to prevent it???

Wouldn't you rather ask them how they may have been helped and saved rather than kicking them in the ass???

I guess I deserve to be judged on that comment, as it was from the hip. This is an emotive (off) topic for me, and I hope I didn't offend anyone who has been in the thick of this stuff. I guess in some ways I'm angry at them for doing what they did, and angrier at myself for
(a) not seeing it coming
(b) not being able to do anything for them

I know about "cries for help," I often work with them. But I also know that when someone decides to take their own life, they will succeed and sometimes no one, not even their family and friends will see it coming, if there isn't a history of mental breakdown or illness.

Now to answer your question: I would (and have done) put my arm around them in this life and done all that stuff IN THIS LIFE. In the possibility of there being a next life, I'm gonna kick ass.

[luther]

I guess in some ways I'm angry at them for doing what they did, and angrier at myself for
(a) not seeing it coming
(b) not being able to do anything for them

Although I said I wasn't going to post on this again I do respect your reply and opinions and don't want you to think I'm simply ignoring you so I will reply to this section only with a little advice if I may........

Be very very carefull of your thoughs and feeling on this. You've said more in the section I've quoted from your reply that perhaps you know and I would say this is shaping your opinion on this subject more that you think, and puts you in the same boat as many many others......

Your lack of understanding of the actions of others is leading you to blame yourself in some way. Believe me, this will never ever ever get you anywhere, or at least nowhere good. I'm not here to preach to you, but I will tell you if this is the case you need to let it go, accept what happened happened and you are not to blame for the actions of others. This is a lesson hard learned, and even more difficult to accept and actually believe, but if I was to leave this forum now and never post again or give another piece of advice, I would gladly do so if you took it and accepted it. I know this is not easy, but if this is actually a problem for you and is shaping your views on this subject, then you really do need to accept it and move on.....

I respect your views and opinions on the subject because I can see exactly how you've arrived where you are. I wish you the very best.........

[Paddii]

Although I said I wasn't going to post on this again I do respect your reply and opinions and don't want you to think I'm simply ignoring you so I will reply to this section only with a little advice if I may........

Be very very carefull of your thoughs and feeling on this. You've said more in the section I've quoted from your reply that perhaps you know and I would say this is shaping your opinion on this subject more that you think, and puts you in the same boat as many many others......

Your lack of understanding of the actions of others is leading you to blame yourself in some way. Believe me, this will never ever ever get you anywhere, or at least nowhere good. I'm not here to preach to you, but I will tell you if this is the case you need to let it go, accept what happened happened and you are not to blame for the actions of others. This is a lesson hard learned, and even more difficult to accept and actually believe, but if I was to leave this forum now and never post again or give another piece of advice, I would gladly do so if you took it and accepted it. I know this is not easy, but if this is actually a problem for you and is shaping your views on this subject, then you really do need to accept it and move on.....

I respect your views and opinions on the subject because I can see exactly how you've arrived where you are. I wish you the very best.........

Thanks Luther. I do understand the actions of others, but will never accept it as valid, as that would seem to me to justify it. Our experiences quite naturally do shape the way we think and feel, and I have learned that other people's actions are not my responsibility, but feelings of anger and failure are always around in these situations. You're right, it is necessary to move on, and it's important to be there for people when they need a little help or even just a listening ear. I have appreciated your comments and am sorry if I have appeared rude or brusque in some of what I said. You seem like a great guy.

This too is my last word on this, out of respect to the original post on this thread and the fact that it has gone way off topic!!

Have a great weekend

[luther]

Have a great weekend

You too buddy..........

[robijntje]

No he did not give the impression he wanted to die. People interpreted his thread in the way they wanted to- as usual. We all read whatever we want to.

The danger of the internet and public forums in general.