Your in the Taliban if...

[Experienced Punter esq]

- U refine heroin for a living but u have a moral objection to beer
- U own a $3,000 machine gun & a $5,000 rocket launcher but u can't afford shoes
- U have more wives than teeth
- U wipe your arse with your bare left hand but consider bacon unclean
- U think vests come in two styles: bullet proof & suicide
- U consider television is dangerous but routinely carry explosive in your clothing
- U cant think of anyone u HAVEN'T declared Jihad against
- U were amazed to discover cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs
- U have nothing against women but believe every man should own at least one
- U bathe monthly whether necessary or not
- U traded at least one wife for a new AK-47