Yesterday, i was returning from a visit to a very special lady i saw in Dublin. Was on top of the world after a fantastic night with her.

Now i dont drive yet so i was coming home by train. Had booked an online ticket for the 9am train from dublin to kerry.

As luck would have it, i was actually early and was able to make the 7am train. At the turnstile in Heuston, i asked the guy at the departure gate was it ok to go on this train, I would've waited no hassle for the later train but he told me no probs, train wasnt full.

So i settle down and daydream about the previous night i had spent with my favourite lady and what a fantastic time i had, always do

An hour or so later, guy comes along checking tickets. Sour faced prick he was too. Handed him my ticket. He looks at it, looks at me, looks at the ticket again, then puffs out his chest and goes "you're not supposed to be on this train" in his most prickish, im a big fat prick, voice of authority.

I reply without even looking at him, "I was told at Heuston i could travel on this train."

He says "you're not in Heuston anymore boyo, you're on my train now and thats an €80 fine"

I sit bolt upright, throw my hoodie off my head, look him straight in the eye and say "you're not getting a penny off me"

So what does Mr. Cunty McBolloxface do, calls another member of staff, tells him im a fare jumper and that when the train stops in Mallow, im to be escorted to an office where i'll be dealt with, guards called if necessary.

The other guys sits down beside me, in fairness, he was pretty cool and explained the guy in Heuston should NOT have told me i was allowed to travel on the train.

We get to mallow and im brought to an office to meet with the stationmaster or some shite. He reels off the same twaddle as the prick who is out to get me.

I tell him categorically, im not paying the fine. They reel off some stupid set of rules about travelling on different trains blah blah blah. I say "i paid for a ticket, i paid for a seat, I didnt take anybodys seat, the train was half empty, not as if i didnt pay at all. Not my fault if you people get your wires crossed and one of you tells me i can travel on the train, and the other cant. Make your minds up and stop shifting the posts to suit yourselves" and on and on it goes.

Eventually after a half hour or more, they say i can go, but if im ever caught doing that again, the guards will be informed and i will be black listed from travelling with Iarnroid Eireann.

Moral of the story? I wont get caught again, so fuck you Irish Rail, bunch of in-bred fucktards

Was i wrong doing what i did, should i have just waited for the right train and should i have paid the fine and just let it be?