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This woman rushed to see her doctor, looking very much worried and all strung out. She rattles off: “Doctor, take a look at me. When I woke up this morning, I looked at myself in the mirror and saw my hair all wiry and frazzled up, my skin was all wrinkled and pasty, my eyes were bloodshot and bugging out, and I had this corpse-like look on my face! What's WRONG with me, Doctor!?”
The doctor looks her over for a couple of minutes, then calmly says: “Well, I can tell you that there ain't nothing wrong with your eyesight....”
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I needed a password eight characters long so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarves
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The Following User Says Thank You to justfrank44 For This Useful Post:
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"I was in a band which we called The Prevention, because we hoped people would say we were better than The Cure
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"I was watching the London Marathon and saw one runner dressed as a chicken and another runner dressed as an egg. I thought: 'This could be interesting.'
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"I had my boobs measured and bought a new bra. Now I call them Joe Cocker and Jennifer Warnes because they're up where they belong."
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The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to justfrank44 For This Useful Post:
Forrest (09-07-12), Rod Stewart (14-12-12)
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Most of us have a skeleton in the cupboard. David Beckham takes his out in public
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The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to justfrank44 For This Useful Post:
Forrest (09-07-12), Rod Stewart (23-07-12)
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My girlfriend said 'did you know that hippopotamuses kill more people every year than guns?'. 'Yes,' I said, 'but a gun is easier to conceal
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The Following User Says Thank You to justfrank44 For This Useful Post:
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The Scots invented hypnosis, chloroform and the hypodermic syringe - wouldn't it be easier just to talk to a woman?
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"Sleeping with prostitutes is like making your cat dance with you on its hind legs. You know it’s wrong, but you try to convince yourself that they’re enjoying it as well
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"If you’re being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire. They’re trained for that
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The Following User Says Thank You to justfrank44 For This Useful Post:
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