Originally Posted by
Eagle87
Listen, I was on a diet until recently - a strict diet, around 1,000 calories per day. What happened? Obviously I fucking slipped and felt shit about myself. I felt pathetic, weak and devoid of any willpower whatsoever. Is this the reality? No. The guilt stemmed from setting myself up to fail. One thousand calories is NOTHING when you're my height and weight. It's an impossible challenge and you're not so much weak as you are stupid for setting yourself that challenge in the first place.
And I bring this up because it's kind of similar to monogamy. I think men and women put a lot of pressure on themselves to stay faithful, and then beat themselves up over it if there's an indiscretion or two. But the truth is lads, monogamy is difficult - really difficult, when you actually think about it.
That one person who you're committed to has to be a perfect match in so many different ways: your personalities have to mesh; your humours have to mesh; you have to be compatible sexually and comfortable with one another's bedroom preferences; you have to like to do the same shit at the weekend; you have to love one another's cooking; you have to be there for each other emotionally; you have to want the same things long term.
You're both in this tiny boat and have to negotiate every single wave by rowing in complete synchronicity on a number of different levels, and it's hard like. It's hard because that one person has to be your partner in a dozen different ways. There's just so many moving parts to an efficient relationship and from time to time one part will go a bit off-kilter and if that relates to the bedroom, and you go off and book an escort for an hour, you're not a rotten human being.
In a way you're setting yourself up for failure by trying to be perfect in a very imperfect world, a world where monogamy is the standard, but being thin is considered the standard too and for some people - fat cunts like me - that's also really fucking difficult. The bottom line is, don't feel guilty. Unless you're treating the escorts terribly or taking genuine satisfaction in 'cheating', you aren't a douchebag. You're human and what you're doing is only morally wrong if you subscribe to the bullshit idea that no matter what, you have to be monogamous. Monogamy is a flawed concept and you are flawed. So am I. So is every-fucking-body.
The one lovely thing in the aftermath of Diego Maradona's death is the realisation that people can be flawed and beautiful simultaneously.