Crap joke of the day

[whiteball]

I bought a new Sat Nav it's really good...
Yesterday I drove past a zoo and it said
Bear left..... Now that's clever!

[whiteball]

Q. What happened to the guy who
assaulted the laughing psychic?
A. He was arrested for striking a
happy medium.

[whiteball]

I've been charged with murder for
killing a man with sandpaper.
I only intended to rough him up a bit.

[whiteball]

Murphy said to Paddy, "What the f@#k are
you doing talking into that envelope."
Paddy replies, "I'm sending a voice mail
you thick b@$t@rd!"

[whiteball]

Last night I tried sharing a bag of chips
with a homeless man who was sat on the
curb... he said sod off and get your own
bl@@dy chips.

[whiteball]

Female response when hit with the
chat-up line..."You look really familiar?"
Female replies, "I don't know... do you
watch a lot of porn?"

[whiteball]

I rang up BT and said: "I want to
report a nuisance caller."
She said: "Not you again."

[whiteball]

A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts
has been discovered in Egypt......
Archaeologists believe it may be
Pharaoh Roche...

[Mrbean76]

[Mrbean76]