And now for something completely different

[bettercallsaul]

A woman was out golfing one day when she hit her ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you 3 wishes."
The woman freed the frog.
The frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes that whatever you wish for, your husband will get 10 times more or better!"
The woman said, "That would be okay."
For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world.
The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis, that women will flock to."
The woman replied, "That will be okay because I will be the most beautiful woman and he will only have eyes for me." So, KAZAM she's the most beautiful woman in the world!
For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, "That will make your husband the richest man in the world and he will be ten times richer than you."
The woman said, "That will be okay because what's mine is his and what's his is mine."
So, KAZAM she's the richest woman in the world!
The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered. "I'd like a mild heart attack."
Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them!
Attention female readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good!


Male readers: Please scroll down.



The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife!!!
Moral of the story: Women are really dumb but think they're really smart!
Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show!













PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen!!!

[Galway_Stud]

nice work, now to find me a frog!!

[willie wacker]

nice work, now to find me a frog!!

[scan for you]

there's Sam 4 from the left.

[adrienn]

there's Sam 4 from the left.

Which one is the magic one?

[willie wacker]

Which one is the magic one?

This one

[Rachel Divine]

A woman was out golfing one day when she hit her ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you 3 wishes."
The woman freed the frog.
The frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes that whatever you wish for, your husband will get 10 times more or better!"
The woman said, "That would be okay."
For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world.
The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis, that women will flock to."
The woman replied, "That will be okay because I will be the most beautiful woman and he will only have eyes for me." So, KAZAM she's the most beautiful woman in the world!
For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, "That will make your husband the richest man in the world and he will be ten times richer than you."
The woman said, "That will be okay because what's mine is his and what's his is mine."
So, KAZAM she's the richest woman in the world!
The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered. "I'd like a mild heart attack."
Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them!
Attention female readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good!


Male readers: Please scroll down.



The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife!!!
Moral of the story: Women are really dumb but think they're really smart!
Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show!













PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen!!!

Very true x

[Best Before]

A woman was out golfing one day when she hit her ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you 3 wishes."
The woman freed the frog.
The frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes that whatever you wish for, your husband will get 10 times more or better!"
The woman said, "That would be okay."
For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world.
The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis, that women will flock to."
The woman replied, "That will be okay because I will be the most beautiful woman and he will only have eyes for me." So, KAZAM she's the most beautiful woman in the world!
For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, "That will make your husband the richest man in the world and he will be ten times richer than you."
The woman said, "That will be okay because what's mine is his and what's his is mine."
So, KAZAM she's the richest woman in the world!
The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered. "I'd like a mild heart attack."
Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them!
Attention female readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good!


Male readers: Please scroll down.



The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife!!!
Moral of the story: Women are really dumb but think they're really smart!
Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show!













PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen!!!

Well done young man, you made me chuckle

Very true x

Welcome back Rach xx

[bettercallsaul]

A boy is at school and he hears the older kids talking about pussy, and their bitch. The boy confused by this goes to his mother. "Mom", the boy asks, "What's a pussy?"The mother being startled by this thinks quick and finds the closest dictionary and opens it up to a picture of a cat and says "Son, that is a pussy." the son then asks "What's a bitch?" The mother again thinking quickly opens to a picture of a dog and says "Son, this is a bitch."The son walks away still confused, and sees his father watching television. The son walks up to his father and says "Dad, what's a pussy?" The father doesn't want to miss the baseball game so he quickly whips out his Penthouse magazine to the centerfold, grabs a marker and draws a circle around the vagina and says "Son, this is a pussy!"The son, now starting to understand what the older boys are talking about asks "Then, what is a bitch?"

The dad replies, "That's everything outside the circle!"

[bettercallsaul]

Little Johnny watched his daddy's car pass by the school playground and go into the woods. Curious, he followed the car and saw Daddy and Aunt Jane in a passionate embrace. Little Johnny found this so exciting that he could hardly contain himself as he ran home and started to tell his mother. 'Mummy, I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, and then he helped her take off her shirt. Then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane...' At this point Mummy cut him off and said, 'Johnny, this is such an interesting story, lets save the rest of it for supper time. I want to see the look on Daddy's face when you tell it tonight.' At the dinner table that evening, Mummy asked little Johnny to tell his story. Johnny started his story, 'I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt. Then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane and Daddy started doing the same thing that Mummy and Uncle Bill used to do when Daddy was away on the rigs.'