how do you deal with grief

[tony1]

how do you deal with grief in you life

[Jetstream]

Different with everyone I guess. Bottling it up didn't work for me when I lost my best friend tragically. Years later my godson died of leukemia and allowing myaelf to cry and talk to people helped a lot. We have this attitude in ireland thstt we need to be strong and keep the chin up... screw that I say. Allow yourself to grieve... talk about it with someone. ..

[meath chap]

Different with everyone I guess. Bottling it up didn't work for me when I lost my best friend tragically. Years later my godson died of leukemia and allowing myaelf to cry and talk to people helped a lot. We have this attitude in ireland thstt we need to be strong and keep the chin up... screw that I say. Allow yourself to grieve... talk about it with someone. ..

sorry for your loss pal that must of bin tough

[blueberry]

Different with everyone I guess. Bottling it up didn't work for me when I lost my best friend tragically. Years later my godson died of leukemia and allowing myaelf to cry and talk to people helped a lot. We have this attitude in ireland thstt we need to be strong and keep the chin up... screw that I say. Allow yourself to grieve... talk about it with someone. ..

I was the same way lost my uncle to sucide when i was 20 didn't know what to do just swept it under the carpet but it affected me until one day I was on my way to Dublin with my brother and I just talked and talked about it was like a load of my chest that I could breath with me it just took time there no shame your weakness in talking about promblems sorry for loss

[tom sand]

men should cry and talk
i cried a while ago an i felt ashamed and embarrassed for crying
maybe its because i am suppose to be a man and strong
i don't know

[rubberlover]

Talk, to your friends, work colleagues, telephone support lines etc etc. Don't keep it locked away and hidden, it just destroys you and makes you a prisoner. I have had to deal with suicide, and cancer deaths in my family and friends over the last few years, thankfully I empowered myself by seeking support from friends and at times professionals. Its a cliche but it is good to talk.

[Stephanie]

men should cry and talk
i cried a while ago an i felt ashamed and embarrassed for crying
maybe its because i am suppose to be a man and strong
i don't know

Some fifteen years ago I had a tragic death , destroyed my soul.

It was sudden , a tragic accident , died in my arms.

I held them in my arms for hours , couldn't let go , took me a week to release the body for cremation.

I howled and buckled in grief. Howled into the desert , howled through the night.

Then became a zombie , unable to cope with everyday. The sorrow crippled me , that loss changed and eroded who I was.

Crying ? I cried a lot.

Took me two years to recover.


In recent times I have stopped crying , and seem to be able to move on faster , my recent griefs buried deep in my soul.

But can go on.

[Sexy Sandy 69]

As said by others 'Talk', women tend to talk more than men, men do bottle up their emotions, there's nothing wrong with holding your hands up & saying I need help. It's not a weakness, it's a strength. As the saying goes 'a problem shared is a problem halved'.

Sandy x

[Vitruvian]

I enjoy my solitude, me time, yet in time's of grief, it's when it hurt the most.
Yes, talking to people helps and yet, it's that same strength that made you care that will ultimately heal, it's in you !!
That and time.

[SteveB]

It does take two years to get over any sort of shock or trauma.
Four or five days and you have usually got over the initial shock.
Some cases you never really get over it completely.
It is not something you want to repeat (not that you have a choice) but the more you experience it, usually the better you deal with it.

It is worth remembering that grief can be a selfish thing, and unless the loss is particularly close to you, there is usually someone closer to the person who may need more support (and support from you) than you do.

But, how do you deal with it? I don't know. Everyone has to cope with it in their own way, I guess.