Dads . Fathers. Et al. xx

[Stella]

"Not to be confused with the Absentee Father, who flamboyantly disappoints, the Stealth Dad exceeds expectations without drawing attention to himself."

"In crisis, Stealth Dad lowers the volume. Stealth Dad doesn't speak up unless he can improve upon the silence."

"The Stealth Dad is at the end of a good run. Social media has made stealth unfashionable, with every utterance now an exhibition. And private family milestones have been outsourced to consultants. When I read about the parent hiring a coach to teach a kid to ride a bike, I mourned for the Stealth Dad."

"Strauss and Howe explain that, for Silents, "their solutions -- fairness, openness, due process, expertise -- reflect a lack of surefootedness, but also a keen sense of how and why humans fall short of grand civic plans or ideal moral standards. Silent appeals for change have seldom arisen from power or fury, but rather through a self-conscious humanity and tender social conscience."








What kind of man was your father ? xx



http://edition.cnn.com/2014/06/12/op...rticle_sidebar

First of all I'm an only child, needless to say how spoilt i was/i am

My dad is the best ever, however gave them really hard time being a teenager, but never ever told me what or how to do, let me help with my decision, but not pushing me, or punishing me.
I wish i can give back all the love i got from them, our relationship is still very close on the phone almost every day.
Think my attitude is pretty similar to his, sometimes mom use to say being ignorant, arrogant is defo coming from him

Only can hope I can admire love him and my mom for a long long time!

[Stephanie]

A slice of amateur psychololgy: As I grew up, I watched the disappointment and the anger my sisters displayed towards their father, a humble quiet kind man who had married a strong vivacious lively woman. He assumed that she could solve all their problems. He loved them quietly. They are all angry at him for being absent. They disregard him.

By contrast, I had lunch yesterday with a woman who adores a similarly kind, quiet father. I asked her if her father, to whom she described herself as close, understood her. "Not at all" she replied, with laughter as if that wasn't the point. He was her dad.

Both that woman yesterday who loved her sweet father and my own sisters whose father irritates them, for all his goodness, seem to me to have the same problem with men: they can hook up with a bastard or a doormat, but nothing in between.

Stealth dad may be a saint, but he walks a thin line with his daughter's welfare

What an insightful , wonderful post !

Thank you for sharing / posting x



*btw , like your Avatar pic

The little things and the achievements you witness are the most rewarding as a Father. I had it tough but i turned out ok and i appreciate all I have and enjoy all I can give without question or thought. And I know the next generation hopefully will continue that.
Too all Fathers enjoy Father's Day this weekend

Thank you so much for posting ! x


Love your Sig : "Love all , trust few , do wrong to none" !!

: Motto to live by !

[Theomegaman]

Don't know how too upload you tube videos. But hers the link too that song "boy named sue" by Johnny Cash
http://youtu.be/tGeLwq7j2pw The final few lines are the ones that always get me.
And too all the wonderful Mothers ............you are pretty cool too.
Have a great day folks and a better tomorrow.

[Stella]

Don't know how too upload you tube videos. But hers the link too that song "boy named sue" by Johnny Cash
http://youtu.be/tGeLwq7j2pw The final few lines are the ones that always get me.
And too all the wonderful Mothers ............you are pretty cool too.
Have a great day folks and a better tomorrow.

There is a little icon for videos all you need to do is copy the link! Enjoy your time here anyway!

[Stephanie]

First of all I'm an only child, needless to say how spoilt i was/i am

My dad is the best ever, however gave them really hard time being a teenager, but never ever told me what or how to do, let me help with my decision, but not pushing me, or punishing me.
I wish i can give back all the love i got from them, our relationship is still very close on the phone almost every day.
Think my attitude is pretty similar to his, sometimes mom use to say being ignorant, arrogant is defo coming from him

Only can hope I can admire love him and my mom for a long long time!

How very fortunate you are to not only have had a supportive Dad while growing up , but to still have him in your life ,

and to be able to appreciate him (and your Mom) even more , as an adult xx

I too hope they will be around , be there for you for a long long time to come yet .

What precious gift , to have such xx

[Stella]

A complete and utter psycho bastard. Violent and cruel. I have fond memories of rushing to stand in-between him and my mother as a 5 year old so he couldn't hit her until in the end she killed herself as the only escape.
He made me scared of my own shadow, avoiding people altogether and hardly spoke in fear
It took me a long time to put myself back together but thanks to some incredibly kind and strong woman I did
Myself and my sister were out of the door as soon as we could and we have both strived to be the complete opposite and raise our own real loving family's

I still have the physical scars where he cut me to remind though of a fathers love.
And my sister wont forget becoming my mothers replacement

May he long rot in hell

Im sorry to read this

Read many articles that a child who had violent parents, will follow the pattern is her/his own family, glad to see its not the case!

[Theomegaman]

There is a little icon for videos all you need to do is copy the link! Enjoy your time here anyway!

Thank you for showing me that. As I said I am learning. Very kind. Have a great day.

[Stephanie]

A complete and utter psycho bastard. Violent and cruel. I have fond memories of rushing to stand in-between him and my mother as a 5 year old so he couldn't hit her until in the end she killed herself as the only escape.
He made me scared of my own shadow, avoiding people altogether and hardly spoke in fear
It took me a long time to put myself back together but thanks to some incredibly kind and strong woman I did
Myself and my sister were out of the door as soon as we could and we have both strived to be the complete opposite and raise our own real loving family's

I still have the physical scars where he cut me to remind though of a fathers love.
And my sister wont forget becoming my mothers replacement

May he long rot in hell

I'm so sorry for the hurt you endured !

Though you still carry anger (and how could you not !?) , you sound a resilient and determined man ,

having taken the painful lesson of how not to be .. as a father / partner xx




I left my own family home at 16 , and have stood on my own two feet since. I was spared your sister's hardship , but not much else.

If you survive it , you become stronger for it , and hopefully can carry on in a positive way -- as you seem to have been able to x

[SteveB]

I'm so sorry for the hurt you endured !

Though you still carry anger (and how could you not !?) , you sound a resilient and determined man ,

having taken the painful lesson of how not to be .. as a father / partner xx




I left my own family home at 16 , and have stood on my own two feet since. I was spared your sister's hardship , but not much else.

If you survive it , you become stronger for it , and hopefully can carry on in a positive way -- as you seem to have been able to x

A complete and utter psycho bastard. Violent and cruel. I have fond memories of rushing to stand in-between him and my mother as a 5 year old so he couldn't hit her until in the end she killed herself as the only escape.
He made me scared of my own shadow, avoiding people altogether and hardly spoke in fear
It took me a long time to put myself back together but thanks to some incredibly kind and strong woman I did
Myself and my sister were out of the door as soon as we could and we have both strived to be the complete opposite and raise our own real loving family's

I still have the physical scars where he cut me to remind though of a fathers love.
And my sister wont forget becoming my mothers replacement

May he long rot in hell

Heavy stuff.
I had a few issues with my own Father, I would not be courageous enough to share them, but nothing like that.

[Stephanie]

A slice of amateur psychololgy: As I grew up, I watched the disappointment and the anger my sisters displayed towards their father, a humble quiet kind man who had married a strong vivacious lively woman. He assumed that she could solve all their problems. He loved them quietly. They are all angry at him for being absent. They disregard him.

By contrast, I had lunch yesterday with a woman who adores a similarly kind, quiet father. I asked her if her father, to whom she described herself as close, understood her. "Not at all" she replied, with laughter as if that wasn't the point. He was her dad.

Both that woman yesterday who loved her sweet father and my own sisters whose father irritates them, for all his goodness, seem to me to have the same problem with men: they can hook up with a bastard or a doormat, but nothing in between.

Stealth dad may be a saint, but he walks a thin line with his daughter's welfare

What an insightful , wonderful post !

Thank you for sharing / posting x

I should've highlighted the part I thought wonderful .. x



Isn't it strange / curious / troubling / perplexing to see such different reactions-feedback to the seemingly same traits ,

coming from different family's daughters.

I wonder :

would the personality of the Mom (wife) have any bearing on how these daughters perceived their respective Fathers ... ? xx