Condoms (Ok the lady will have them, but no stud goes anywhere without these...)

A trench coat, false moustache and over-sized glasses in case you need to get past hotel security cameras or fear a Sunday World sting outside your escort's apartment.

A brown envelope stuffed full of fake 20 euro bills and 6 Dunkin’ Donuts in case the Guards turn up and you need to get rid of them quick smart.

A charming photo of your 3-legged dog to show the ladies (You've found they go the extra mile for you when they find out your a disabled dog carer...).

A Carl Douglas CD because you like to shag to "Kung Foo Fighting" but you've found the ladies don't always have your favourite song to hand (Honestly, if prostitution was legalised you are sure these problems would be resolved).

A nice pair of brand new size 10 knickers, because you always steal the ladies panties upon leaving so you've something to smell on the way home, but, cause you're a nice guy, you always leave them a new pair.