Results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    1,366
    Blog Entries
    3
    Reviews
    3

    Default We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male

    We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note ... these are all numbered '1' ON PURPOSE!

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put
    it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us
    complaining abou...t you leaving it down.

    1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of
    it that way.

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints
    do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

    1. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

    1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
    That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
    In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

    1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect
    us to act like soap opera guys.

    1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the
    ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

    1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it
    done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say
    during commercials.

    1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach,
    for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have
    no idea what mauve is.

    1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act
    like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth
    the hassle.

    1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an
    answer you don't want to hear.

    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.
    Really.

    1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared
    to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster
    trucks, Sex with your best friend and you,

    1. You have enough clothes.

    1. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

    1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the
    couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like
    camping.
    Last edited by Ray; 07-04-12 at 13:20.
    I believe that sex is the most beautiful, natural, and wholesome thing that money can buy

    Luna just melts my heart, treat her well,

  2. The Following 13 Users Say Thank You to Ray For This Useful Post:

    anon361 (07-04-12), bulmers19 (07-04-12), Cable87 (07-04-12), dyana (07-04-12), harry10 (07-04-12), LaBelleThatcher (07-04-12), mature abby (07-04-12), max california (07-04-12), mcgyver (07-04-12), Sexy Fernanda (07-04-12), takemedrunkimhome (07-04-12), the traveller (07-04-12)

  3. #2

    Default

    ahahhahahah!!!! now if i would be a guy i would worship you!

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to dyana For This Useful Post:

    Ray (07-04-12)

  5. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    4,202
    Blog Entries
    176

    Default

    Brilliant x

  6. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    16,753
    Reviews
    57

    Default

    Brilliant cause they are all so true

  7. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    1,767

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ray View Post
    We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note ... these are all numbered '1' ON PURPOSE!
    ...and do you remember when these acutely suicidal feelings first began?


  8. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    6,466
    Blog Entries
    2

    Default

    Thanks for the laugh!!!
    This will be very useful for me in the future!!
    xxx
    Retired for good all together.
    Thank you all the gentlemen I met, who I'll have sweet memories of it.
    Kids, don't do anything that I wouldn't after I'm gone( the good part?) not much left Loll





  9. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Posts
    267
    Reviews
    10

    Default

    The definative rules at last priceless
    Last edited by bulmers19; 07-04-12 at 15:37.

  10. The Following User Says Thank You to bulmers19 For This Useful Post:

    Ray (07-04-12)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •