Why bother

[UKHeather]

Heather- this is another question in vein of OP- on face it seems black & white but imho ( & experience) the reality is much more complex; Appreciate where you're coming from...but you make a number of not always accurate assumptions i.e. Not all husbands do this on the qt/ Not all wives will leave if they found out ( sure some will, but going for NSA sex isn't the same as an affair etc)...
As an Escort- how do feel knowing that a marriage could end if one of your clients got found out?

I did think about that after I had posted. That maybe I should have addressed it particularly to the married guys who are doing it secretly, and said..assuming your wife would end the marriage.. But decided that was probably the situation for the majority of married clients here, and so left it.
As an escort, I feel no responsibility for the choice that a married man makes when he decides to visit me.

[Corefinder]

what I can never understand is how a man can risk everyting just for the sake cheating. by cheating they have showed a lack of honesty & ability to be secretive & deceitful is it really worth it?

[FunnyName]

As an infrequent punter, for me it's purely a release of tension. Yes, I am in a relationship, and yes, she does know about what I do.

You see, it's a huge generalisation to say that your relationship is fucked just because you punt. I can only speak for myself, but I am not monogamous by nature, and I'm mature enough to know my own mind. I seem to have a nature that doesn't handle monogamy very well, and that goes back to evolution, spreading your genes and all of that. Escorting provides an infrequent relief for me to do that, and as it's a business transaction, no relationship of a romantic nature occurs. The monogamous stereotype everyone seems to follow is, remember, a social stigma, so if those involved aren't getting hurt, how is the relationship fucked?

My SO asks how I got on, and if I learned anything. She asks me if the escort was pretty, and even joined me on a couple of occasions, although not in this country. She knows I love her, but that variety is the spice of life. Just because you desire someone different doesn't mean something is wrong. It just means that you desire variety, and that is part of human nature. But I would never replace my partner. She's not perfect, and neither am I, but she's damn close to being so.

The confusion may be that escorting and punting can be viewed as starting an affair and this is a gross mistake. The escort is paid for her/his time, and things take place. An affair is where you seek somebody else out for a relationship to either augment or replace the one you are currently in, and THAT can be destructive. Escorting is a business transaction, and if all of those involved bear that in mind, then there would be no confusion.

I wonder would you mind your Girlfriend/Wife relieving tension with another Man. Purely for sex? Male Escort perhaps, maybe she doesn't want to. But if she did, and went through with it and told you about it. Would it bother you at all?

[Corefinder]

I wonder would you mind your Girlfriend/Wife relieving tension with another Man. Purely for sex? Male Escort perhaps, maybe she doesn't want to. But if she did, and went through with it and told you about it. Would it bother you at all?

where is the love in that situation that is not love

[experiencedguy]

I wonder would you mind your Girlfriend/Wife relieving tension with another Man. Purely for sex? Male Escort perhaps, maybe she doesn't want to. But if she did, and went through with it and told you about it. Would it bother you at all?

She did, with my permission, as stated in a previous response. I had no problem with it as I wanted her to be happy, and would agree again.

[UncleBob]

As an infrequent punter, for me it's purely a release of tension. Yes, I am in a relationship, and yes, she does know about what I do.

You see, it's a huge generalisation to say that your relationship is fucked just because you punt. I can only speak for myself, but I am not monogamous by nature, and I'm mature enough to know my own mind. I seem to have a nature that doesn't handle monogamy very well, and that goes back to evolution, spreading your genes and all of that. Escorting provides an infrequent relief for me to do that, and as it's a business transaction, no relationship of a romantic nature occurs. The monogamous stereotype everyone seems to follow is, remember, a social stigma, so if those involved aren't getting hurt, how is the relationship fucked?

My SO asks how I got on, and if I learned anything. She asks me if the escort was pretty, and even joined me on a couple of occasions, although not in this country. She knows I love her, but that variety is the spice of life. Just because you desire someone different doesn't mean something is wrong. It just means that you desire variety, and that is part of human nature. But I would never replace my partner. She's not perfect, and neither am I, but she's damn close to being so.

The confusion may be that escorting and punting can be viewed as starting an affair and this is a gross mistake. The escort is paid for her/his time, and things take place. An affair is where you seek somebody else out for a relationship to either augment or replace the one you are currently in, and THAT can be destructive. Escorting is a business transaction, and if all of those involved bear that in mind, then there would be no confusion.

Best post I've read here in a while. Well done, sir.

[UncleBob]

Actually, she has in the past, but felt the lack of emotional attachment was a barrier to her enjoyment. Just to clarify also, she's not my wife.

I have a question - is she polyamorous (or whatever term you prefer) also?

[UncleBob]

Now folks just to set the record straight I'm not having a go at anyone in the post it was a bit of a rant but I think it's an interesting question some guys have issues at home that can't be helped and some guys find it no problem whatsoever but there is that guilt factor of hurt and pain that can be caused not only to others but to yourself but by the answers and pms it seems to be man are looking for a buzz a fix a fantasy a risk that we can keep to ourselfs. Correct me if I'm wrong.

For me (like experiencedguy, I think) it's like seeing a doctor, or a physio. I don't obsess over whether those professionals would care if I wasn't paying for their services, why is this any different? And it certainly doesn't mean that I can't like and get on with the person providing the service

[Franken996]

what I can never understand is how a man can risk everyting just for the sake cheating. by cheating they have showed a lack of honesty & ability to be secretive & deceitful is it really worth it?

Em..are you a punter or just someone having a nose around in here...& did you read any of the previous posts in this thread?

where is the love in that situation that is not love

Is that Haiku?! ( Joking aside- is English your first language?)

[Headlad]

Is that Haiku?! ( Joking aside- is English your first language?)

Haikus are easy
But sometimes they don't make sense
Refrigerator