Well ive being here a year.........jesus...a whole fuckin year.Ranting and raving and generally acting the bollox.ah well whats new.
Hey Sweetie,hey Pat,hey,ive some old carpet im dumping.Would you like to buy it.Ill give it to you real cheap(the carpet that is).Hey you can sweep all the important issues that you dont want to deal with this coming year,under it.It will save ya having to go away and come back when a post is on the second page and forgotten about.And like i said at the start of the year,before i was so rudely interupted by the Anti-West brigade,what about upping the prize money?Jaysus ,love,you certainly solved the problem...by taking away the comps.
Ah,yeah i knew there was something.I rarely read newspapers.In fact i prefer The Beano or Peanuts.They are not quite as funny and sure as hell make more sense.I mean tonight i managed to look inside one of these pisspots called newspapers and came upon wise words of wisdom.Oh yes,chocolate can be used as a form of pest control.Now thats news to me.
Every Easter,Xmas,millions of men worldwide actually embrace this phenomena called peace and quiet.Their Sweeties are eating chocolate at these times.I remember well, a former gf,this one got really bad with her periods.I mean, i often prayed to God to reincarnate me as a womans period when i return to this earth again.A first class trip through "The Tampon Tunnel".
How are you today love,
Great ,so your in better form than yesterday?
Time of the month again love?
Jesus ,how many months in your calender year love?
Chill out sweetie ,here have some chocolate.Take your time eating it,leave it melt in your mouth love.Yeah chocolate is certainly a great form of pest control.
I once told a girl that my cock was like a malteser,it would melt in her mouth not in her hands.I ducked away fast enough with that one.
Sweetie,you must take the bull by the horns and deal with important issues to these old fellas here,you know false reviews,false pics, ah heres a plug for a sweetie i saw last night or this morning should i say.Sofi,nice one,only thing is she is like Rapunzel looking out the fuckin window all the time.Rapunzel,Rapunzel let down your hair to me.Thank fuck for Bungalows.looking at me when i was going away too.Ah well,the charm ozzzzzzzzzes even in the bloody dark.
I wonder where The Ladoooooo is?I heard he has no progressed to building four piece lego walls (cornors inclusive).Apparently he is still trying to fit that last piece.Keep him away from gropping the birds i guess.
The fuckin lesbian neighbours hate me now.The Manatee,oh christ ,naked cometh the Manatee.She came to a window during the week to shut the curtains,naked.I was out the back ,letting the dog run around.I nearly to to revive him from the fright.Some chance of breeding him now.He is probably just a curious bear.As for me,jesus the sheer sight of the naked Manatee made me shit myself.Could look at the boyo for at least one night.If she ever gets pregnant then well have the worlds first cloned scarecrow.A test-tube of virtual horror.Be my demise.
Anyway ,have a happy Xmas and hey youll def have a peaceful New Year because Uncle West wont be around.I must say its a great feeling of zero pressure being applied to my Daddy Bags.What a change.
What a feeling,