Alternative names for genitalia

[samlad]

I know grown women that still at the words 'penis' and 'willy'!

[benin]

I know grown women that still at the words 'penis' and 'willy'!

[smithsheldon]

What about masturbation?

Emptying the bins
Pulling one off/cracking one off
Spanking the plank
Pulling your plonker
Taming the snake
Stroking the salami
Saying hello to Madame Palm and her five lovely sisters
Shaking white hot coconuts from the veiny love tree
Beating the meat

Clean the pipes
Hand Shandy
ham shank

[BootSlick55]

I was planning to start a thread on vagina names before I saw this thread. Eerie no?

Reason being that I don't think there are any good-sounding names in English for that part of the female anatomy.

Pussy is just ok.
C**t is crude, and ignorant sounding.
Snatch is just silly.
Fanny does not mean a vagina anymore.

The only word that I find somewhat adequate is Quim, even if it is archaic. It sounds nice, not harsh, and it has a melodic quality that reflects the pleasure given by the item it describes.

Do other languages have some better slang terms for the vagina, I wonder? Portuguese is a wonderfully melodic and flowing language to my ear at least, even if I cannot understand it. Maybe there will be found a suitable candidate. Or French, the language of love. C'est vrai, n'est pas?

Maybe I should start a new thread on this?

As for the penis... I call mine Ronnie Corbett because it's small and makes people laugh.

[rover]

Your Willie: Wobbly Wonder.

Masturbate: Toss yourself off or Shake Hands with the Devil.

[samlad]

I watched 'The Naked Gun' (comedy gold!) and couldn't stop lauging when Richard Griffiths starts mistakingly reading the erotic novel in front of hundreds of people, saying something like, "And he thrust his purple headed warrior into her quivering mound of love pudding"!

Classic!

[aml]

Hello there chaps and chapettes!

The English language is such a wonderful thing and is one of the mother tongues of this glorious planet. What is unique about the English language is it's ability to shape the meanings and connotations of words, allowing us to express ourselves in such a way that other languages find it nigh-on impossible to do.

To celebrate the linguistic diversity of the English language, I would like to start a thread allowing us to share some of our 'penile' pseudonyms in order to amuse ourselves!

Let me begin with a few for 'The Penis'

Wang
Pocket rocket
Purple headed-love slug
Meaty warrior
Lamb cannon
Kidney cracker
Heat seeking moisture missile
Giggle stick
Twig n' berries
Meat and two veg

That should get the flow going.

Ding a ling,i can't think of any more

[samlad]

Ding a ling,i can't think of any more

How about:

-Ankle spanker
-Engine cranker
-John Thomas
-Spam javelin
-Shaft

[benin]

I watched 'The Naked Gun' (comedy gold!) and couldn't stop lauging when Richard Griffiths starts mistakingly reading the erotic novel in front of hundreds of people, saying something like, "And he thrust his purple headed warrior into her quivering mound of love pudding"!

Classic!

dead right pure comedy gold

[aml]

How about:

-Ankle spanker
-Engine cranker
-John Thomas
-Spam javelin
-Shaft

Another 1 johnson....