My doberman likes to come upstairs and jump on my bed every morning. If I have woken up with morning wood I usually bang one out with her in the room, before going down for breakfast.

Will my masturbating in front of the dog affect her in any way psychologically? Should I stop choking the chicken in her presence?

Am I a bad person?

The views of veterinarians, farmers and dog whisperers would be most welcome. No fat chicks. No time
wasters.