Joke of the day

[tom sand]

[Klittyliker]

My wife keeps complaining about my premature ejaculation, she took it on the chin at first but now it just gets on her tits!

[Floki]

Q, What's long and thin, covered in skin, red in parts and you stick it in tarts?

A, Rhubarb.

[willie wacker]

A fisherman,s santa

[Mister Anderson]

Deep in the countryside, miles from civilization, a husband and wife have just climbed into bed for the night when a knock comes at their door.
Startled from his encroaching slumber the husband, John, drags himself out of bed and vexedly dressed.
He makes his way downstairs and goes to the front door. Leaving the security chain on the door he opens it and peeps out.
"What'cha want!?" he barks into the night. A voice from the darkness replies "Could I get a push?".
"Fuck off!" John intones, while slamming the door shut. And off he trudges back up the stairs.

John undresses and climbs back into the bed beside his wife. As he settles himself his wife, Mary, asks "Who was it?"


John "Dunno".
Mary "What did they want?"
John "He was looking for a push"
Mary "What did you tell him?"
John "I told him to fuck off"
Mary "John! Where's your sense of decency"
John "What!"
Mary "Have you considered that someday you might be stuck in the back of beyonds late at night with a broken down car. How would you feel if that was the reaction you got when you had to knock a stranger's door?"
"Oh for fuck's sake!" says John as he climbs out of bed.

Having dressed and made his way downstairs John now opens the door. Clearing his throat he calls into the dark ...

John "Hello!?" ...
John "Hello!?! Can you hear me?"
Stranger "Yes. Hello"
John "Where are you?"

Stranger "I'm over here on the swing ..."

[willie wacker]

[Klittyliker]

[SmallHorn]

[willie wacker]

[hot4babes]

a womans fanny is like a shed roof, if you don't nail it hard enough it will end up next door