a horse walked into a bar
and asked, is there a camel, toe there wasnt any there.
a horse walked into a bar
and asked, is there a camel, toe there wasnt any there.
I walked in on my gran giving my grandad a blowjob.
"Oh dear.i'm very sorry.I thought you would be finished with all that now at your ages," I said
"Are you joking?" replied my gran," have you seen the price of cheese?".
several years ago my wife came to me one night and said we should watch a porno together.
Excited I rushed to the video store and rented the nastiest-sounding title I could find
I rushed home popped the tape in the VCR and cuddled with my wife on the sofa We watched for the hardcore action to begin but there was nothing...
the screen just stayed black with an occasional flicker."maybe the tape is defective",
she sighed
i'll take it back" i said i'm gutted.. i was really looking forward to watching Head Cleaner",
emmasweet (10-02-15), Forrest (11-02-15), Melindablondey (10-02-15), nonpareil (26-03-15), simplesimon (12-03-15), ThomasJ (11-02-15)
A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner. Both he and his wife decide that they won't tell the kids what kind of meat it is, but will give them a clue and let them guess. The dad said, "Well it's what Mommy calls me sometimes." The little girl screamed to her brother, "Don't eat it. Its an asshole!
Dirty Harry (15-02-15), Forrest (11-02-15), Melindablondey (10-02-15), nonpareil (26-03-15), royaler (11-02-15), Seriouslyhot (10-02-15), simplesimon (12-03-15), Tommy H (10-02-15)
Q: Why wasn't Jesus born in Australia?
A: They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.
Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Chickens didn't exist yet.
Q: How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves?
A: She fell out of the tree.
A man is being arrested by a female police officer, who informs him, "Anything you say can and will be held against you."
The man replies, "Boobs!"
Engaging Personality
Mesmerising Eyes
Magnificent Ass
Adorable LadySexy, Wicked, Enticing, Erotic, Tease
Dirty Harry (13-02-15), emmasweet (11-02-15), Gobshite (11-02-15), Melindablondey (14-02-15), nonpareil (26-03-15), royaler (12-02-15)
what do you call a train that dosen't stop at your station?
Thomas the Bastard!!
bollocks (13-02-15)
my wife just called me.
she said three of the girls in the office have just recieved some flowers for valentines Day,they are absoluetly gorgeous.
I said "that's probably why they've recieved flowers then".
bollocks (13-02-15), Forrest (24-03-15), Melindablondey (14-02-15), UB40 (19-02-15)
The New Website possibly joke of the week,
I am the slave of Irish Mistress XXX, a Fetish Queen, A Bossy Bitch Mistress, A Goddess, yes my life is tough, but it is so good.
Webcam and phone chat sessions available
Dirty Harry (26-02-15), Forrest (24-03-15), nonpareil (26-03-15), UB40 (19-02-15)
My best friend dared me to take a shit on an electrified train track.
that's the last time I put my arse on the line.