Weekend Humour

[Forrest]

This one is dedicated to Fitzy :

One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner are seated, waiting for the cockpit crew to show up so they can get under way. The pilot and co-pilot finally appear in the rear of the plane, and begin walking up to the cockpit through the center aisle. Both appear to be blind.

The pilot is using a white cane, bumping into passengers right and left as he stumbles down the aisle, and the co-pilot is using a guide dog. Both have their eyes covered with huge sunglasses. At first the passengers don't react, thinking that it must be some sort of practical joke. However, after a few minutes the engines start revving and the airplane starts moving.

The passengers look at each other with some uneasiness, whispering among themselves and looking desperately to the stewardesses for reassurance. Then the airplane starts accelerating rapidly down the runway and people begin panicking. Some passengers are praying, and as the plane gets closer and closer to the end of the runway, the voices are becoming more and more hysterical. Finally, when the airplane has less than 20 feet of runway left, there is a sudden change in the pitch of the shouts as everyone screams at once, and at the very last moment the airplane lifts off and is airborne.

Once safely airborne, the passengers grin sheepishly to each other, feeling a little foolish that they should have thought that there was any problem, and a little embarassed at their screaming.

Up in the cockpit, the pilots remain silent until they reach their assigned flight level. At this point, the co-pilot breathes a sigh of relief and turns to the pilot:

"You know, one of these days the passengers aren't going to scream", he says gravely, "and then we're all going to die"

Brilliant, Scotus