Advice/Thoughts On A Dllemna

[Stephanie]

Aware that this subject may be triggering for some providers here, I don't plan to get into a debate on this topic. I'm deeply sympathetic to any victims of sexual violence, but that was not what this thread started as. I also understand completely that many would be unwilling or incapable to show even a smidgen on empathy for such prisoners.

I’m triggered on bases of Justice x

I’d be triggered same if we were talking about abuse of animals .

Be same triggered on any injustice and harm to innocents x

[MiaX]

This seems directed at me, so let me respond.

There is no "what about" here. Nothing about writing a letter suggests condoning a sexual crime, nor does it suggest a lack of empathy for victims of sexual crime.

Sexual crimes also have one of the lowest rates of recidivism (Irish Prison Service 2013), and US studies show a significant reduced rate of recidivism in felons who receive certain forms of behavioural treatment.

People like Larry Murphy should be locked up for good as their crimes deserve it and at least to this untrained eye - he seems untreatable. Let's not confuse two totally different things.

It is not just about the reoffence rate. You need to take into considetation the long lasting effectvit can take on onr's life, it can be a slow death. It is easy to be understanding, if you have never been a victim of such a crime. You don't know the trauma it can cause, not everyone is strong enough to overcome it, do some more research on the subject, I have all my empathy and compassion for the victims. One ruined life equals murder to me. Slower, but just the same.

[MiaX]

This seems directed at me, so let me respond.

There is no "what about" here. Nothing about writing a letter suggests condoning a sexual crime, nor does it suggest a lack of empathy for victims of sexual crime.

Sexual crimes also have one of the lowest rates of recidivism (Irish Prison Service 2013), and US studies show a significant reduced rate of recidivism in felons who receive certain forms of behavioural treatment.

People like Larry Murphy should be locked up for good as their crimes deserve it and at least to this untrained eye - he seems untreatable. Let's not confuse two totally different things.

Oh, and I wasn't directing it at you, wasn't attacking you, it is the topic, that fires me up.

[IrishSarahBarra]

Thank you - and yes - my friend (and you) has a valid point to a certain degree - but it's my conscience!!! Your concise and thoughtful response is valued and greatly appreciated. Maybe I should start to help escorts live a better life - tongue in cheek before I pop off to bed!!!

https://www.volunteer.ie/blog-volunt...th-be-my-eyes/

You could do this. I have a blind friend who uses them... invaluable.

[Stephanie]

I have volunteered for the Irish Council for Prisoners Overseas which supports Irish prisoners overseas in a Penfriend scheme. I have prepared my first draft for a prisoner accordingly, but was curious about the prison he was serving in, so I googled it and found out it is a prison for "sexual offences" which alters my perspective. A friend said I should hate the "sin" and not the "sinner" but I'm not sure if I should to go ahead or am I being a hypocrite for judging - any thoughts/advice would be greatly appreciated without condemnation for raising the issue. Thank you.

Sexual Offenses


There are diff kind of offenders .

Forcible rape - in our society as it was til recent times - was rarely about sex , it is about power .

The offender frustrated in his life , perhaps powerless in his position in society : finding the most

vulnerable available weakest victim to overpower and dominate . The most profound domination

of a human is penetrating their body / and psyche against their will .

Some such perpetrators cannot even perform the physical act for lack of ardor , they may use

objects to violate their victim . Would intense counseling and support services prevent subsequent

reoffending ? Perhaps .

These would be - generally - the violent offenders : forcible act upon a woman or child .

Perhaps they themselves were abused as a child , feel powerless over their trauma and station in life .

Intense targeted counseling over many years May have them find appropriate outlet for their anger ,

May ( May !!! ) prevent future attacks . May .



Pedophilia

An innate sexual attraction to children / prepubescent / underage ones : boys or girls .

It is an innate “born with” sexual drive . True pedophiliacs cannot help it , cannot change who and how they are .

: It’s if you are heterosexual , you are attracted to women . Would you be able to a change that ? No .

The Big Thing about it is : they’re not allowed to act on their desires . Should Not be allowed to act on their desires .

I can hardly imagine a worse fate , but that is their lot .

So long they do not offend ,

all social support should be provided and offered to Prevent the living out of them needs and desires .

Once they become an offender and have harmed a child - no more compassion .

Chemical castration , psych facility .



And now the advent of a new type of sexual offender :

Male sexual frustration borne out of lack of available appropriate sexual partners ,

those sexual needs not hindered by our traditional social values ,

we Will see more sexual attacks on women in this society / as it happened and happening

in other European countries .

: Cultural differences , lack of women’s rights in other countries , men from places with diff

social norms and mores taking opportunities to satisfy their sexual needs with unwilling ‘partners’ :

may that be a young prepubescent girl ( or boy ) , or young women minding their own business

in everyday settings that formerly were safe .

These attacks are based on sexual need , force and violence used only to subdue a victim / or

alternately the long approach of grooming unwitting young ones into submitting to being used

as sexual objects , used as sexual outlet for an individual offender or group of offenders .



Which of these would you like in Your neighborhood ?

[IrishSarahBarra]

Would you rather they did themselves in or completed their sentence, genuine question?

Yes, do themselves in if they did it. Especially those ones who plead not guilty. It probably wouldn't be any better for the victim except for a mild sense of recognition but it'd be better for the world and for both sets of families...but they don't...

That's if it would even get to trial. They should all do themselves in if they did it.

[MiaX]

Sexual Offenses


There are diff kind of offenders .

Forcible rape - in our society as it was til recent times - was rarely about sex , it is about power .

The offender frustrated in his life , perhaps powerless in his position in society : finding the most

vulnerable available weakest victim to overpower and dominate . The most profound domination

of a human is penetrating their body / and psyche against their will .

Some such perpetrators cannot even perform the physical act for lack of ardor , they may use

objects to violate their victim . Would intense counseling and support services prevent subsequent

reoffending ? Perhaps .

These would be - generally - the violent offenders : forcible act upon a woman or child .

Perhaps they themselves were abused as a child , feel powerless over their trauma and station in life .

Intense targeted counseling over many years May have them find appropriate outlet for their anger ,

May ( May !!! ) prevent future attacks . May .



Pedophilia

An innate sexual attraction to children / prepubescent / underage ones : boys or girls .

It is an innate “born with” sexual drive . True pedophiliacs cannot help it , cannot change who and how they are .

: It’s if you are heterosexual , you are attracted to women . Would you be able to a change that ? No .

The Big Thing about it is : they’re not allowed to act on their desires . Should Not be allowed to act on their desires .

I can hardly imagine a worse fate , but that is their lot .

So long they do not offend ,

all social support should be provided and offered to Prevent the living out of them needs and desires .

Once they become an offender and have harmed a child - no more compassion .

Chemical castration , psych facility .



And now the advent of a new type of sexual offender :

Male sexual frustration borne out of lack of available appropriate sexual partners ,

those sexual needs not hindered by our traditional social values ,

we Will see more sexual attacks on women in this society / as it happened and happening

in other European countries .

: Cultural differences , lack of women’s rights in other countries , men from places with diff

social norms and mores taking opportunities to satisfy their sexual needs with unwilling ‘partners’ :

may that be a young prepubescent girl ( or boy ) , or young women minding their own business

in everyday settings that formerly were safe .

These attacks are based on sexual need , force and violence used only to subdue a victim / or

alternately the long approach of grooming unwitting young ones into submitting to being used

as sexual objects , used as sexual outlet for an individual offender or group of offenders .



Which of these would you like in Your neighborhood ?

Very well summarized!

[Thoreau]

Aware that this subject may be triggering for some providers here, I don't plan to get into a debate on this topic. I'm deeply sympathetic to any victims of sexual violence, but that was not what this thread started as. I also understand completely that many would be unwilling or incapable to show even a smidgen on empathy for such prisoners.

In fairness, I have to applaud you for sticking your head above the parapet - that takes moral courage and really think you should not be condoned for your "intelligent" or different views. For the record, I agree with your assessment that I started the "Thread" for genuine reasons (my dilemna) and as already stated - my conscience would not allow me to continue and that's me, although to a certain extent, I was influenced by some conclusive "thoughts" that were expressed here with obvious passion. A special mention to MidLifeCrisis who really "hit the nail" on the head with his valuable comments about me, which are noted and will reconsider with the organisation if I am suitable for the scheme, even with the best intentions. I want to sincerely thank everyone who put forward constructive viewpoints - for/against/inbetween.

[Thoreau]

https://www.volunteer.ie/blog-volunt...th-be-my-eyes/

You could do this. I have a blind friend who uses them... invaluable.

My goodness me - nearly missed this one with all the brouhaha so far!!! I will be applying - THANKS to you - maybe I can be of some use. Forever grateful.

[Palatine]

In fairness, I have to applaud you for sticking your head above the parapet - that takes moral courage and really think you should not be condoned for your "intelligent" or different views. For the record, I agree with your assessment that I started the "Thread" for genuine reasons (my dilemna) and as already stated - my conscience would not allow me to continue and that's me, although to a certain extent, I was influenced by some conclusive "thoughts" that were expressed here with obvious passion. A special mention to MidLifeCrisis who really "hit the nail" on the head with his valuable comments about me, which are noted and will reconsider with the organisation if I am suitable for the scheme, even with the best intentions. I want to sincerely thank everyone who put forward constructive viewpoints - for/against/inbetween.

There's so much darkness and crap in the world, much of it self-perpetuating. Abuse begetting abuse, violence begetting violence. Breaking the cycle is hard. Fair play to you for looking for a way to add some light and goodness into the balance. If you decided to go ahead with it, I'd applaud you for just doing some good for a human being, but likewise if you decide not to because of the nature of the crime that's OK too - it's very hard sometimes. Finding somewhere else to redirect your kindness - that's the way forward, I think.

I try. I was grumpy with the self-checkout supervisor in Tesco this morning because she seemed pretty inefficient. I'm sorry about that, and hope she doesn't soak it in and get grouchy with a kid at home later. I'm not pretending to be good at this, and I have short patience for things like this and forum vuvuzelas. But when moments of clarity allow me to overrule my lack of patience, I try to ensure that what I'm passing on in any interacton with another human being isn't negative, and maybe positive.