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Thread: Omegle

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    somewhere along bus route 46A

    Default Omegle

    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    You: howeya
    Stranger: hey ooft im naked
    You: i'm constipated
    Stranger: so is ur mam
    You: she was before but had a shit yersterday
    Stranger: i no i smelt it in my mouth
    You: really , did you rim my ma
    Stranger: yer
    You: oh so your the cunt havin an affair with my 71yr old ma
    You: i so want to have a shit it's not the best of feelings
    Stranger: awww
    Stranger: ill help
    You: can feel my bowels full to the brim
    Stranger: ill giv u a massage relax ur whole body
    Stranger: includin ur bowels
    You: ooh nice one
    You: tell me this , do you use esacorts for kinky sex like i do
    Stranger: hopefully one thing wont be relaxed
    You: one thing ?
    Stranger: yer i do
    You: when did you last have a punt , wanna have one tomorrow
    You: hopefully i'll have had a big shit before
    Stranger: oki doki
    You: did you know there is black toilet paper that you can buy off the internet
    Stranger: omfg
    You: yeah i know it's crazy innit
    Stranger: innit bruv
    You: i'm not your bruv
    Stranger: yer u are
    Stranger: nd i still do OUR mum
    You: no your my half bruv , i'm adopted , you have sex with your mammy
    Stranger: ok
    Stranger: i pissed in ur mouth last night
    You: well my mouth did taste rather odd this morning , thought it was the gone off milk i used for my breakfast
    Stranger: i want to eat ur dick
    You: maybe later on in life when i have finished fucking and want to be dickless you can eat it
    You: have you eaten many dicks in your short useless life
    You: ?
    Stranger: i lost count
    Stranger: deffo more thn 3 nd a half
    You: anything past 1 must be hard for a simpleton like you to count
    Stranger: yer
    You: what time does daddy want you to blow him at
    Stranger: i only hav 3 nd a half fingers to count on
    Stranger: hes dead thanks a fuckin lot
    You: your thumbs dont count as fingers so you only have 1 and a half fingers
    You: how did your da die
    Stranger: cancer
    Stranger: of the bowel
    You: thats cause he took many a dirty mickey up his shitter
    Stranger: so wat if he was gay
    You: it's a free world , but you should get some counselling all the same
    Stranger: i hav had counciling
    You: no that wasn't counselling , that was confession to a priest
    You: even the priest thinks you should hand yourself in to the authorities
    Stranger: iv had counciling frm izyy
    You: no you haven't , you are a very accomplished liar
    Stranger: izyy is sitin with me
    Stranger: shes 14
    You: ah so you are a paedo as well ?
    You: how did izzy council you
    Stranger: she let me get out all my feeling and boobs
    You: you disgust me to my core
    You: only on the internet could i find someone as pathetic as you to fill a few minutes out of my day
    Stranger: thank you
    Stranger: ur mum filled sumthing last night
    You: i'm adopted remember you idiot , it's your mum not mine
    Stranger: ok
    Stranger: ur adopted cos i didnt want u
    You: why didnt you want me ???
    Stranger: u were an ugly baby
    You: so was the ugly duckling , but he grew up to be a beautiful swan
    Stranger: ur a swan
    Stranger: there the only birds with penises
    You: exactly , now we are finally getting nowhere fast
    You: is that your phone i gear ringing ?
    You: hear
    Stranger: no its ur mam i meen my mam
    You: does your mam sound like a phone ringing ?
    You: is it dinner time is that why she is there
    Stranger: when u hit the right note
    You: what note is that
    Stranger: e
    You: major or minor
    Stranger: major
    You: i'm tone deaf so watcha gonna do
    You: i'm also colour blind
    Stranger: spank her hARder
    You: only if she wants it and asks politely for it
    Stranger: ok mr killjoy
    You: how the fuck did you know my name
    Stranger: gregorry
    You: jesus h christ i'm getting totally freaked out , can you see me as well ?
    You: do you wanna know something ?
    Stranger: yer
    Stranger: u hav a 12 inch penis
    You: it's bigger than mine fair play to you
    Stranger: lol
    You: i'd be laughin too if i had a 12incher ! do you use a pump to get extra size
    Stranger: no
    Stranger: i use a magazine
    Stranger: sum tyms my dads old videos he left me in his will
    You: aw shucks you should come into the real world sonny , no one whacks off to magazines any more , use the internet for all your porno requirements
    Stranger: im a girl
    Stranger: im 14
    Stranger: my name is jessica mary reed
    Stranger: im in the uk
    You: then you should be using diddos or vibrators
    Stranger: my mums drunk
    Stranger: nd my gf izyy is sittin on ma lap
    You: naughty little underage sluts the pair of ya
    Stranger: thanx
    You: watcha wearing
    Stranger: leopard print undies and a white pink nd black bra
    Stranger: nd izyys wearin zebra print bra nd thhong
    You: but earlier you said you were naked , so wats up with that lie ?
    Stranger: i put clothes on
    You: i've had enough of talking to you , put izzy on please
    Stranger: fuk u sideways
    Your conversational partner has disconnected.
    I have no signature at the moment

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    somewhere along bus route 46A


    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    You: usa ?
    Stranger: yes
    Stranger: you?
    Stranger: and i have boobs
    You: ireland , i have a dick
    Stranger: great
    You: i know
    You: what size your boobs
    Stranger: too big
    Stranger: i can't walk through doors
    You: have you tried opening the doors first ?
    You: see you americans are stupid
    Stranger: oh i haven't!!! YOU'RE SO SMART
    Stranger: i have been starving in this room for years
    Stranger: you solved my problem
    You: i'll send you the invoice for my services
    Stranger: okey
    You: most americans are fat
    Stranger: but i have to warn you, i'm poor
    You: are you on welfare benefits to cope
    Stranger: i haven't gone to work in three years
    You: you're fat stupid poor and american and unemployed
    You: and starving
    Stranger: when you're smart and all, maybe you could tell me what should i do: my friend is a big rabbit
    You: how big is big , like are we talking over 6 ft tall ?
    Stranger: she's human size
    You: and can anyone else see this rabbit friend
    You: or just you ?
    Stranger: i haven't asked
    Stranger: i think not
    You: what do you want me to do about your rabbit friend
    Stranger: make her disappear
    You: maybe you should ask her to leave you alone ?
    Stranger: she doesn't listen
    You: have you tried writing her a letter , sometimes a letter can get your point across better than words
    Stranger: i can't write
    Stranger: with pen
    You: where did you meet the rabbit
    Stranger: under the bridge
    You: did you mean to seek out this rabbit as a friend
    You: or did it kinda just happen that the 2 of you spent more an more time around each other
    Stranger: yes, i was lonely
    Stranger: i love her
    You: it coulda happened to anyone , lonely hearts tend to seek solice in the strangest of places with the strangest of creatures
    Stranger: really... you're so clever
    You: if you love her why then do you want her to disappear ?
    Stranger: you want my msn? so i can ask your help in the future?
    Stranger: it's coplicated
    You: no dont want it thanks
    Stranger: complicated
    You: i cant help you ................................................................................ ....................................ever
    Stranger: too bad
    You: too bad for you but great for me
    Stranger: not really
    Stranger: i'm good in bed
    You: so am i , i can sleep for hrs on end
    You: what is it that makes you good in bed
    Stranger: i have pussy
    You: do you keep it looking nice
    Stranger: yes
    You: and is your pussy a happy pussy
    Stranger: yes
    Stranger: she laughs a lot
    You: what makes her laugh
    Stranger: now my rabbit is a human again
    Stranger: i don't know... me tickling it?
    You: why are you asking me , it's your pussy remember , i have a dick so i cant answer
    Stranger: too bad
    Stranger: yes i am tickling it
    You: and do you tickle your pussy much ?
    Stranger: all the time
    You: describe a typical tickling session
    Stranger: i just tickle it... and it laughs
    Stranger: and then i cry
    You: why do you cry
    Stranger: after laughing my pussy swears and calls me with bad names
    You: what bad names does your pussy call you
    Stranger: like "dildohead" and "dickface"
    You: and do you secretly enjoy being called such dirty things
    Stranger: no i don't
    Stranger: that's why i cry
    You have disconnected.
    I have no signature at the moment

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    somewhere along bus route 46A


    You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
    You: hey hey
    Stranger: stacy?
    You: no but if you want i'll be brittney
    Stranger: who brittney?
    You: oh baby baby
    Stranger: spears no way?
    You: yeah waaaay
    Stranger: narr
    Stranger: when where you born
    Stranger: ?
    You: 19someting , and you can be Kfed
    Stranger: dnt look it up
    Stranger: but i want to be brad
    You: well i'm 26 so do the math yourself
    Stranger: you be jolie
    You: thats gonna cost you more than brittney
    Stranger: really how much more?
    You: twice
    You: how you gonna pay me
    Stranger: drink?
    Stranger: what do you want to be paid in?
    You: cold hard cash
    Stranger: but im only got euros?
    You: euros will do
    Stranger: what your name address
    Stranger: im 12
    You: has your voice broken yet
    Stranger: and your 26 your
    Stranger: older
    You: older is a state of mind , i'm young at heart
    Stranger: yr and i ahve a 8inch if you want to know
    Stranger: what else you want to know
    Stranger: forever young i want to be forever young
    You: not bad for a 12yr old
    Stranger: thanks
    You: imagine how good life will be when your 13
    Stranger: that wat everyone says
    Stranger: i jsu love being naked
    Stranger: how?
    You: how what , i didnt ask you anything
    Stranger: you said imagine ho good life would be at 13
    Stranger: and i said how?
    Stranger: when does it stop growng?
    You: i cant answer that cause i told you to imagine , i didn't tell you how good it would be , i said IMAGINE
    Stranger: i have good imagine ation but i dont know how it would be
    You: then that just proves that your imagination sucks and is no use at all
    Stranger: oh
    You: yeah now your gettin it
    Stranger: can yu imaginen?
    You: sure can
    Stranger: i bet you rich
    You: how much will you bet ?
    Stranger: with a big house with a hunky amn that tends to you every need
    Stranger: alot
    Stranger: am i right?
    You: a hunk amn ? what on earth are you on about ?
    Stranger: man
    You: no i have a robot that does everything i want it to
    Stranger: dildo?
    Stranger: ha ha ha
    You: no robot not dildo
    Stranger: oh
    You: a dildo is designed differently to a robot
    Stranger: how?
    Stranger: but it is a machine
    Stranger: and a toy
    You: well a robot is metal whereas dido is a woman who sings songs
    Stranger: sings song
    Stranger: ar they good songs
    You: yeah if you are a fan of good songs , then you will enjoy dido more than if you didnt like her
    Stranger: who her
    Stranger: do you use one?
    You: use what again
    Stranger: dildo for good singing
    You: no , a microphone works far better than a dildo to sing with
    Stranger: oh but you said it makes good songs
    You: no dido makes good songs , you seem to be drawn to dildos a lot
    Stranger: you said it
    Stranger: why are you talking to me i am 12
    Stranger: and your 26
    You: it takes 2 to tango , why are you talking to me
    You: disconnect if you wanna
    You: i'm not stopping you
    Stranger: but i like you
    Stranger: you funny
    Stranger: it does as we all ahve found out
    You: am i funny as in i amuse you , or funny like a clown funny
    Stranger: amuse me
    Stranger: do you want to be friends?
    You: no i have enough friends as it is , and if you and i were to become friends , then it might wreck one of my other friendships with some of my other friends
    Stranger: why dont you like me?
    You: it's not that i dont like you , i just dont care about you
    Stranger: oh
    Stranger: well ok then im sorry that i ahve wasted your time
    Stranger: do you want me to go?
    You: again i couldn't care less what you choose to do but it would be more productive if we were to part now
    You have disconnected.
    I have no signature at the moment

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Under Patricia.........
    Blog Entries


    Luther : Rimmerguy are you pissed???
    Rimmer : Yes Luther, I thing I am......
    Luther : Thanks, but you should have said that in the beginning, would have saved me trying to read the last 3 posts..........
    Rimmerguy : Hmmmmm..... ya, sounds a bit nuts alright, are you pissed Luther.........
    Luther : No, bit I think if I was, it would make more sense............
    Rimmerguy : I'll be back tomorrow to explain, if I remember it...............
    Advertising space available for hire, and reviews for sale, just call

    "It's far easier to fight for principles than to live up to them."

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2007


    Should Rimmer give up the drink?
    Yes its not agreeing with u...

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