Chuck Norris Edition
Hi everyone!
Does anyone have any good Chuck Norris jokes?
Please. share em here and let's have a great Friday
- The dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris wrong once, just once.
- Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
- Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
- Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
- Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
Barney Rubble (14-05-21), Bukar (14-05-21), IDF2 (17-05-21), MartaMod (14-05-21), Stephanie (14-05-21)
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-Chuck Norris was attacked by Covid-19. Virus is self isolating at the moment.
-Jesus, Pope and Chuck Norris standing at the river bank but want to get to the other side. Jesus goes first and makes it, Chuck goes second and makes it. Pope makes couple of steps and drowns.
Jesus says to Chuck: Ha, you also knew about the stones!? Chuck says: Which stones?
-Chuck Norris was born on 6th of May 1945, Germans surendered the next day, coincidence?
-When ghosts sit around camp fire they tell spooky stories of Chuck Norris
“The aim is to balance the terror of being alive with the wonder of being alive.”
― Carlos Castaneda
Barney Rubble (14-05-21), IrishSarahBarra (30-06-21), TheSavannah (14-05-21)
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Chuck Norris and his Friend Jimmywere strolling down the street when Jimmy exclaimed,
"how sad - a dead bird." Chuck looked up and said, "where?"
I have a good Irish Joke too
What do you call an intelligent man in Ireland?
A tourist.
I'm Heading over to Ireland soon on a short visit
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Chuck Norris went on porn once and all the women within five thousand kilometres got pregnant.
If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.
MartaMod (14-05-21)
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As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" Chuck Norris stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".
Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
Last edited by EmmaEA; 14-05-21 at 14:37.
MartaMod (14-05-21), TheSavannah (14-05-21)
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TheSavannah (14-05-21)
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TheSavannah (14-05-21)
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Chuck Norris sees a nice lady with big breasts. He asked, "Excuse me, can I bite your breasts for $1000?" She agrees, so they go to a secluded corner. She opens her blouse and Chuck puts his face in her breasts for 10 minutes." Eventually the lady asks, "Aren't you gonna bite them?" He replies, "No, it's too expensive."
IrishSarahBarra (30-06-21), Silvergrey25 (11-03-23)
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Poppy
-The Nights
Last edited by TheNightShift; 14-05-21 at 14:53.
IDF2 (01-12-22), MartaMod (14-05-21), TheSavannah (14-05-21)
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