Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack?
He only comes once a year.
Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack?
He only comes once a year.
“Try not to become a man of success, but rather become a man of value.” – Albert Einstein.
Mrbean76 (02-08-21)
Established Member
Certified E-I Addict
My boss hates it when I shorten his name to dick , maybe that's because his name is Steve.
What do you call a fear of giants ?
Feefiphobia.
We should thank heaven for nipples. Without them boobs would be pointless.
People are usually shocked when they find out I'm not a good electrician.
How do you organise a space party ?
Planet...
We have two lives , the second begins when we realise we only have one .....
“Las Vegas and Glasgow have a lot in common: they’re the only two places in the world where you can pay for sex with chips.”
“Try not to become a man of success, but rather become a man of value.” – Albert Einstein.
MidlifeCrisis (04-08-21), Mrbean76 (03-08-21), SteveB (03-08-21)
What’s the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?
The taste.
“Try not to become a man of success, but rather become a man of value.” – Albert Einstein.
MidlifeCrisis (04-08-21)
Established Member
Becoming Addicted to E-I
What do you call a man with...a bird on his head? Cliff
With a spade in his head? Doug
Class, a bit of sass and a lot a ass? Oh Hi!
"Dont they all have lovely bottoms..."
“I went to buy a Christmas tree. The guy goes, ‘So you can put it up yourself?’ I said, ‘No, I was thinking the living room.”
“Try not to become a man of success, but rather become a man of value.” – Albert Einstein.
What do you get if you cross an owl and a rooster?
A cock that stays up all night.
“Try not to become a man of success, but rather become a man of value.” – Albert Einstein.
Mrbean76 (05-08-21)
Established Member
Certified E-I Addict
What do you call a nervous javelin thrower?
Shakespeare.
Everyone knows where the big apple is but... does anyone know where Minneapolis ?
How did the hacker escape the police?
He just ransomware !!
What do you call a sad cup of coffee ?
A depresso.
I tried catching fog the other day....
Mist.
What do you call a cavemans fart ?
A blast from the past.
We have two lives , the second begins when we realise we only have one .....
TheNightShift (15-08-21), TheSavannah (16-08-21), yourehighered (21-08-21)
I’ve been taking Viagra for my sunburn. It doesn’t cure it but it keeps the sheets off my legs at night.
“Try not to become a man of success, but rather become a man of value.” – Albert Einstein.
Stephanie (04-06-22)
Established Member
Certified E-I Addict
A sign above the toilets in a pub read .....
Men to the left
Because women are always right .
We have two lives , the second begins when we realise we only have one .....
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