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Thread: Free Sex

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    South Dublin
    Posts
    351
    Reviews
    3

    Default Free Sex

    My fellow punters.
    During the boom years many of us had substantial cash to spend on whoring-sorry escorts, but now during these lean times cash is in shorter supply, but our appetite for escorts (), is still there. So we have to look at other methods of getting kinky sex.
    Now I have an idea- why dont we get sex without paying out 250e per go for it?
    Yes- its so fucking simple I dont know why I didnt think of it before!
    So we have to go seek women out for sex, and its easy!
    You see- women are everywhere, in the gyms, in the shops, supermarkets everywhere!
    So go to, for example, a supermarket- always a good place to find confused women, just grab a basket and walk around looking for skirt, you will recognize it easy, it looks confused as its trying to decide which to buy- Barrys tea or Lyons tea, just go up to it and say "I just love this Barrys tea as I listen to my Daniel O Donnell CDs" When she hears that she will impressed by your choice of music, and she will be greatly thankfull to you for ending her confusion.
    Now you have your foot in the door, so keep up the momentum- ask her to help you decide which flowers you should buy for your sick 90 year old next door neighbour, she will walk with you to the Flowers section, once there just take your time, stall it out, and string her along.
    After that you tell her your feet are tired and you are going for a coffee, and invite her along! When you get her there- then you tell her of your background- that you are an Olympic sportsman or Ireland (Dont worry, shes a woman- knows nothing about sports), that you also own your own company, earning million a year (this is important for a woman- she has to know you have money, and plenty of it).
    Then you offer to carry her groceries for her to her car, once there she will ask you back to her place- so she can thank you properly, and you know what this means, dont you?- YES 3 hours of wild sex with her in her bed!!!!!
    You should leave before 5 o clock, before her husband comes home, and take all your used condoms, lube, handcuffs, lingerie, nipple clamps and cock rings with you.

    So you see, its easy to keep up your habits you gained in the boom years!
    And no more paying out 400-500 euro per session either!
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    A man s mission in life is to spread his seed with as many women as possible, for as long as possible, in any position possible . . . .

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    well b t y b r. . .
    Posts
    1,283

    Default

    [QUOTE=Dick Spunk;81024]My fellow punters.
    During the boom years many of us had substantial cash to spend on whoring-sorry escorts, but now during these lean times cash is in shorter supply, but our appetite for escorts (), is still there. So we have to look at other methods of getting kinky sex.
    Now I have an idea- why dont we get sex without paying out 250e per go for it?
    Yes- its so fucking simple I dont know why I didnt think of it before!
    So we have to go seek women out for sex, and its easy!
    You see- women are everywhere, in the gyms, in the shops, supermarkets everywhere!
    So go to, for example, a supermarket- always a good place to find confused women, just grab a basket and walk around looking for skirt, you will recognize it easy, it looks confused as its trying to decide which to buy- Barrys tea or Lyons tea, just go up to it and say "I just love this Barrys tea as I listen to my Daniel O Donnell CDs" When she hears that she will impressed the fuck.

    daniel o donell cd`swhat age group of women are you talking about dick?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    mandela house
    Posts
    1,752
    Reviews
    7

    Question womens magazines!

    dick ive told you before to keep away from them womens magazines in the doctors waiting room!

    i think if you told her about daniel o'donnell cd's, while drinking tea, i'll think she will leave the store not invite you back to hers!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Somewhere down the crazy river.
    Posts
    683
    Reviews
    20

    Default

    Your mad Dick. Fecking mad.

    Daniel o donnell me arse!
    ”The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.”

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