Oh phew, that's a lot easier to deal with. I wouldn't worry about the forum too much. I came here because I wanted a look at Mr. Anderson and then I got roped into something funny. Thought I wouldn't last a week because I was too soft, he agreed.
Sometimes I wonder does he look at me and think, Jesus what happened to her. Probably not. But obviously some part of me does think the forum ebbs at you or I wouldn't bother to wonder about it at all.
Still remember the first time someone gave out to me, another escort and I was depressed for 4 days straight. Which sounds crazy because it's an anonymous person and someone I'll never meet but still ...you know yourself.
It gives highs and lows. Ignorance is bliss. Yada, yada. It's not real and it is. Just don't worry about it too much ...you ain't the only one to go through those moments and it ain't a reflection on you, it's just what happens.