Limericks.

[alcatel]

There once was an internet poster
Said life is like a roller coaster.
Found escort websites
Kept him up through the nights
With his mickey as hot as a toaster.

[alcatel]

There once was a grumpy old monk
One day discovered his spunk
He even came to see
That when he had a pee
It shot out of him like a young punk.

[alcatel]

There once was a minister called Fitz
Had very, very, very big tits
She called for a ban
On every horny man
It really, really, really is the pits.

[rincewind]

There once was a man from Bel Air
Who was doing his wife on the stair
But the banister broke
So he doubled his stroke
And finished her off in mid-air

[rincewind]

There was an old Irish mick
whose cum was exceedingly thick
He could squeeze it out
And spray it about
But it stuck to the end of his dick.