First of all Tom sorry you also was bullied as a kid as any form of bully especially as a child and growing up with the aftermath of it can linger on in ones mind for many years. And good for you for having the ball to stand up for yourself however unlike you I never stood up for myself so kept being bullied at school and did not make things any easier the bullies living on our street and being so introverted as a child who would not say boo to a goose it went on for years and years and took its toll on me for years with depression into my adulthood.
It also had a detrimental effect on my education and my family life too as it did my confidence as such thing being said like how stupid and ugly I was my eyes were like two pools of diarrhea with frogs swimming in them, nose like concord waiting to take off and my legs so skinny they in fact would break at any moment and would never be able to achieve anything and as we all know if you tell a child long enough such and such they will start to believe that.
So as a teenager and in my early adulthood I used to think when people looked at me they were doing so because I was so very ugly and walk with my head down and only talk to other seeing though my long hair which covered my face. It was not until moved to London where I met so many positive loving people who saw me differently and showed me, me through their eyes and there is not a day which goes by still today, I don’t think about them with the most fondest of memories and kindness for the effect they had in my later life.
Of course I am a very different person now and yes like I have mentioned previously now am able to stand up for myself and help children who were also in a worse vunrable state then I ever was and made new laws to protect them as well as got offers of jobs one would only offer someone that looked the part which many think when I have posted it, its because I am up my own ass when in fact its because I am proud of what I have achieved in my life for myself and for these kids and have proved bullies wrong.
No one knows what another person is going through behind the keyboards or what they may have had or are dealing with in their everyday life unless someone actually mentions it on these threads or post but then take pleasure out of a person’s sadness or loss it so very wrong.
There is a very big difference between some having a bit of banter, even a slagging match between two people or don’t get on or in fact just got the wrong end of the stick for whatever reason but when a group of people on a form or anywhere have to turn into a mob and belittle someone for what they have did or said on-line and then expect an explanation to only their satisfaction or to them start threads about said person calling them names just to try and make more gang thread (thankfully EI usually takes them down before they go any future) or because they are trying to stop other people in the same business posting on-line its totally out of order.
I will say no more as I am not trying to turn this thread into a negative one just wanted to have my say.
And as Kate has already said what I would not have been able to put so eloquently into words as she has done, I will just copy and past in total agreement below and hope the threads and all of us posting try to be nicer to one another or just dont respond so negativly.
Lady Von Teese
And agree it’s a good thread Nat
Originally Posted by
tom sand
i spent alot of time in school in fights
physical fights in the play ground
with kids who wanted to bully me
i thank god for my temper
i never would take it from them
if i ever had kids
that one thing i would worry about
[QUOTE=CurvaceousKate;1539318I A know what you are saying there, but maybe a little restraint needs to be exercised now and again. I've seen some posts where I can see it getting nasty and I may actually agree with the sentiment of the stronger side, but how does it help if I contribute with the same sentiment? It just keeps the ball rolling. Sometimes it's better to say nothing and use the thank you button to show your agreement.
I suppose it's a case of knowing where to draw the line and sometimes that's before you've even started if you arrive at a thread that's already in full flow.
I've also noticed a few posters that do pull back when they see it turning bad, so it's not everyone and it is good to see who does have empathy for others.
I know this is just a forum and not real life, but people do commit suicide because of situations that get out of hand online, people do take things to heart and like it or not some people using sites like this will be emotionally vulnerable. It's all very well telling them they shouldn't be here if they can't take the heat, but this might be their life line and in a sad way, also their decent.
Just think twice before posting is what I'm trying to say I guess. Is what you're about to type funny or belittling? etc.[/QUOTE]
Originally Posted by
CurvaceousKate
I've watched your posting Nat and if anything it is generally diffusing and taking the heat off others, by taking the mickey out of the ones that are winding up in a light hearted fashion. Actually often it has nothing to do with the thread at all lol, which is funny. I'm certainly not trying to point the finger at anyone, as it would be unfair, as this kind of stuff has been going on for years and some weren't even here then.
It's very hard to know what people are going through in their personal life due to the nature of the forum (the irony of it!) So very hard to know what state of mind anyone is in. I think it's always best to err on the side of caution and assume it could tip them over, than trust it won't. (unless you have met in person and feel you know them well enough).
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