Taking a risk - help me ladies

Life has been very hectic of late and posed me many challenges both in my home life, my health and those around me and in my work but am beginning to see light at the end of the tunnel.

Recently my wife and I had an animated discussion about our non existent sex life. We still sleep in the same bed but for more than half our married life have not had sex, in fact the last time was over ten years ago. It only bothers her if she thinks I am getting it elsewhere but she does not regard it as important. Its for procreation and that's it.

I have a wide circle of friends, none of whom know of my involvement with the ladies I meet here, and that circle includes several ladies whom I find attractive and I think some of them have a notion for me too. Some are married, not many, most are single and they range in age from half my age to older than me.

I think I am friendly, gregarious and able to talk to anyone about any topic and have them feel comfortable in my company.

My point is, and here's where I need advice, should I grab the bull by the horns and just tell some of these female friends that I would like to take them to bed if they were open to some NSA fun. How would some of you ladies respond if you were presented with this question and what would be the best words to use.

My thoughts are to meet them for coffee and just get to the point at some stage and just say it if the vibes were right.

I would stay well away. These 'no strings attached' things rarely work out and usually end with one or both parties falling in love. Then there is the fact that if at any point you decide to stop it, she may not like that and could turn into a bunny boiler and knows enough about you to hit you where it hurts and leave your family life vulnerable and there is also the fact that your wife could find out another way and quite happily divorce you as you are no longer important (had the kids) and she can have your money for adultery.

There is also the fact that if your 'no strings attached' lady friend finds out that you are seeing sex workers, she may feel that is you cheating on her and that could be another big problem, plus if you start having unprotected sex with a 'no strings attached' lady friend, you never know for sure if she is being exclusive and what risks you are taking with STI's.

There is also the fact that they may not be too keen on the idea when you run it past them and decide to gossip about it and then you get all the aggro without even having got a kiss.

I'm actually surprised after all these years of playing it safe with sex workers you would think this is a safe and viable option.

I'm not disputing your ability to find or have a 'no strings attached' friendship by the way, just that it's really not a wise decision.

Life is to short not to live it happier.

I/we made a decision many years ago to call it quits on our relationship as we were just not happy and ended up hating each other. It's a big brave move.

So my advise is get away from the bull you have before grabbing any horns

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Originally Posted by Bogman

Life has been very hectic of late and posed me many challenges both in my home life, my health and those around me and in my work but am beginning to see light at the end of the tunnel.

Recently my wife and I had an animated discussion about our non existent sex life. We still sleep in the same bed but for more than half our married life have not had sex, in fact the last time was over ten years ago. It only bothers her if she thinks I am getting it elsewhere but she does not regard it as important. Its for procreation and that's it.

I have a wide circle of friends, none of whom know of my involvement with the ladies I meet here, and that circle includes several ladies whom I find attractive and I think some of them have a notion for me too. Some are married, not many, most are single and they range in age from half my age to older than me.

I think I am friendly, gregarious and able to talk to anyone about any topic and have them feel comfortable in my company.

My point is, and here's where I need advice, should I grab the bull by the horns and just tell some of these female friends that I would like to take them to bed if they were open to some NSA fun. How would some of you ladies respond if you were presented with this question and what would be the best words to use.

My thoughts are to meet them for coffee and just get to the point at some stage and just say it if the vibes were right.

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Go for it...................Ive nothing to lose;)

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Originally Posted by Bogman

Life has been very hectic of late and posed me many challenges both in my home life, my health and those around me and in my work but am beginning to see light at the end of the tunnel.

Recently my wife and I had an animated discussion about our non existent sex life. We still sleep in the same bed but for more than half our married life have not had sex, in fact the last time was over ten years ago. It only bothers her if she thinks I am getting it elsewhere but she does not regard it as important. Its for procreation and that's it.

I have a wide circle of friends, none of whom know of my involvement with the ladies I meet here, and that circle includes several ladies whom I find attractive and I think some of them have a notion for me too. Some are married, not many, most are single and they range in age from half my age to older than me.

I think I am friendly, gregarious and able to talk to anyone about any topic and have them feel comfortable in my company.

My point is, and here's where I need advice, should I grab the bull by the horns and just tell some of these female friends that I would like to take them to bed if they were open to some NSA fun. How would some of you ladies respond if you were presented with this question and what would be the best words to use.

My thoughts are to meet them for coffee and just get to the point at some stage and just say it if the vibes were right.

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Ya I had a fuck buddy for a while once, well me and my friend had her every second night and it worked out fine.
We all went our ways later and are still friends. But here,s the crux none of us were married.
It might work but both parties need be able to keep the love out of it or it will get very messy/
Also if she is a friend of your wife then forget about as it will go back to her

This seems a strange question to me. You don't give many clues about what you think of your marriage, or what your motivation would be for taking this risk.

If you want to stay married, an affair is a huge risk, much more complicated and risky than seeing escorts, and I think you should only consider it if you are earnestly looking for a romantic relationship. The strange thing to me is that you speak as if there are a number of candidates - I think most affairs begin when you really fall for one person, or at least click with them. I think many women would be less than impressed if they are propositioned without some sense that they are the special person in your life.

Maybe you are clearer in your own mind than you described, but if not I would do some serious thinking about what you want, and how it might happen, before making any moves. Good luck - from what you say it sounds as if you are due some better luck.

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Originally Posted by SophieX

Be prepared for rejection IMHO..... :kiss:

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I'm cheeks hurt at the moment :D

Never take advice on what could be life changing decisions like these, from people whose name isn't on your mortgage deeds or childrens birth certs

(If you insist........ensure everyone involved are tee totallers :tapedshut:.........and have just as much to lose)

#tooclosetohome

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Originally Posted by xagerate

Never take advice on what could be life changing decisions like these, from people whose name isn't on your mortgage deeds or childrens birth certs

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No I think he should and film it...:D

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Originally Posted by SophieX

what? :wave:

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Sorry I was laughing... I said my cheeks hurt face cheeks like

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Originally Posted by irishdeltaforce

:confused: At this turn of events?

Is anybody helping here? :dunno:

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Nope ............:o

An other thread gone off topic ,,,,,,,, again :rolleyes:

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Originally Posted by irishdeltaforce

:confused: At this turn of events?

Is anybody helping here? :dunno:

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Annabel took a wrong turn and Sophie was apparently in the car behind :rolleyes:

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Originally Posted by irishdeltaforce

Has this something to do with a high speed car chase? :)

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No green fairies

at least visiting escorts u get what u pay for. having affairs or no strings fun often gets messy. maybe move out of home for a while and take the big gamble and see what happens

Crazy stuff, should you not been trying to get them into bed 10 years ago and would have explored that avenue before paying for sex, you got it the wrong way round but good luck lad.

Bogman
i don't know dude
i do not know

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Originally Posted by Bogman

Life has been very hectic of late and posed me many challenges both in my home life, my health and those around me and in my work but am beginning to see light at the end of the tunnel.

Recently my wife and I had an animated discussion about our non existent sex life. We still sleep in the same bed but for more than half our married life have not had sex, in fact the last time was over ten years ago. It only bothers her if she thinks I am getting it elsewhere but she does not regard it as important. Its for procreation and that's it.

I have a wide circle of friends, none of whom know of my involvement with the ladies I meet here, and that circle includes several ladies whom I find attractive and I think some of them have a notion for me too. Some are married, not many, most are single and they range in age from half my age to older than me.

I think I am friendly, gregarious and able to talk to anyone about any topic and have them feel comfortable in my company.

My point is, and here's where I need advice, should I grab the bull by the horns and just tell some of these female friends that I would like to take them to bed if they were open to some NSA fun. How would some of you ladies respond if you were presented with this question and what would be the best words to use.

My thoughts are to meet them for coffee and just get to the point at some stage and just say it if the vibes were right.

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The above would also describe mine and I suspect many others situation.

I suspect my other half, has a fairly good idea that I visit escorts. I also suspect that she feels that me visiting escorts is not threatening our marriage. I did have one fling which started off ok,,,,no secret was made of it,,,,but it soon got difficult.

The NSA visits to escorts seems safe enough. Also you are unlikely to get an STD from an escort, nor end up supporting another child for 18 years or more

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Originally Posted by irishdeltaforce

I was going to say something about washing up fairy liquid.

But then I remembered the OP didn't want to hear my opinion.

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I'd say he won't like there's either

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Originally Posted by Bogman

Life has been very hectic of late and posed me many challenges both in my home life, my health and those around me and in my work but am beginning to see light at the end of the tunnel.

Recently my wife and I had an animated discussion about our non existent sex life. We still sleep in the same bed but for more than half our married life have not had sex, in fact the last time was over ten years ago. It only bothers her if she thinks I am getting it elsewhere but she does not regard it as important. Its for procreation and that's it.

I have a wide circle of friends, none of whom know of my involvement with the ladies I meet here, and that circle includes several ladies whom I find attractive and I think some of them have a notion for me too. Some are married, not many, most are single and they range in age from half my age to older than me.

I think I am friendly, gregarious and able to talk to anyone about any topic and have them feel comfortable in my company.

My point is, and here's where I need advice, should I grab the bull by the horns and just tell some of these female friends that I would like to take them to bed if they were open to some NSA fun. How would some of you ladies respond if you were presented with this question and what would be the best words to use.

My thoughts are to meet them for coffee and just get to the point at some stage and just say it if the vibes were right.

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So you expect to approach one of your lady friends and say "Look, I dont have sex with my wife anymore, but I would like to have sex with you instead, No strings attached... like..."

Insanity... :D

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Originally Posted by Bogman

Life has been very hectic of late and posed me many challenges both in my home life, my health and those around me and in my work but am beginning to see light at the end of the tunnel.

Recently my wife and I had an animated discussion about our non existent sex life. We still sleep in the same bed but for more than half our married life have not had sex, in fact the last time was over ten years ago. It only bothers her if she thinks I am getting it elsewhere but she does not regard it as important. Its for procreation and that's it.

I have a wide circle of friends, none of whom know of my involvement with the ladies I meet here, and that circle includes several ladies whom I find attractive and I think some of them have a notion for me too. Some are married, not many, most are single and they range in age from half my age to older than me.

I think I am friendly, gregarious and able to talk to anyone about any topic and have them feel comfortable in my company.

My point is, and here's where I need advice, should I grab the bull by the horns and just tell some of these female friends that I would like to take them to bed if they were open to some NSA fun. How would some of you ladies respond if you were presented with this question and what would be the best words to use.

My thoughts are to meet them for coffee and just get to the point at some stage and just say it if the vibes were right.

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My opinion: Stick to the ladies on EI.

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Originally Posted by SophieX

Having met Bogman a fair few times, its safe to say, he actually gets off on, the thought of being caught.... maybe he'll wake up and realise this was all just a fantasy... :rolleyes:

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I'm sure it's real.... ur so cynical sophie...
P's must send u today's cock pictures

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Originally Posted by Bogman

Life has been very hectic of late and posed me many challenges both in my home life, my health and those around me and in my work but am beginning to see light at the end of the tunnel.

Recently my wife and I had an animated discussion about our non existent sex life. We still sleep in the same bed but for more than half our married life have not had sex, in fact the last time was over ten years ago. It only bothers her if she thinks I am getting it elsewhere but she does not regard it as important. Its for procreation and that's it.

I have a wide circle of friends, none of whom know of my involvement with the ladies I meet here, and that circle includes several ladies whom I find attractive and I think some of them have a notion for me too. Some are married, not many, most are single and they range in age from half my age to older than me.

I think I am friendly, gregarious and able to talk to anyone about any topic and have them feel comfortable in my company.

My point is, and here's where I need advice, should I grab the bull by the horns and just tell some of these female friends that I would like to take them to bed if they were open to some NSA fun. How would some of you ladies respond if you were presented with this question and what would be the best words to use.

My thoughts are to meet them for coffee and just get to the point at some stage and just say it if the vibes were right.

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I can't answer your question because;
(a) I'm not a lady.
(b) I am not - and never have been married.






But to answer you question. "Are you f**king nuts??????????"

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Originally Posted by SophieX

Having met Bogman a fair few times, its safe to say, he actually gets off on, the thought of being caught.... maybe he'll wake up and realise this was all just a fantasy... :rolleyes:

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Being discovered that you visit escorts, would not be good, especially if all your reviews were read, plus the expenditure. Could happen from leaving your special phone around,etc,etc.

Living with a second partner could end up costing you half your assets,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,and if the second relationship ends up in pregnancy,,,,,,,,,,,,leave you with very little indeed.

Personally i sometimes regret leaving any reviews, as they could be used as evidence against you,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,especially if you forgot to log off

On the other hand, they were good experiences

Problem is we cant keep our minds shut.

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Originally Posted by annabel taylor

I'm sure it's real.... ur so cynical sophie...
P's must send u today's cock pictures

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Ohh she likes the odd cock picture, u should've said

Must take my antibiotics before the photo-shoot this time

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Originally Posted by SophieX

you know, you two make a lovely couple...... perhaps take a leaf out of Bogmans book.....

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Naah I'm a cunt apparently

And she'll only want me for my tits

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Originally Posted by JAMESCORK

So you expect to approach one of your lady friends and say "Look, I dont have sex with my wife anymore, but I would like to have sex with you instead, No strings attached... like..."

Insanity... :D

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I think it's more a fantasy !
Sounds good but , the reality of it probably won't work,
I don't think women do NSA attached like blokes do

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Originally Posted by ford pefect

I think it's more a fantasy !
Sounds good but , the reality of it probably won't work,
I don't think women do NSA attached like blokes do

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They do, they're just more choosy :)

Ha that's because they hold the balance of power

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Originally Posted by Bogman

Life has been very hectic of late and posed me many challenges both in my home life, my health and those around me and in my work but am beginning to see light at the end of the tunnel.

Recently my wife and I had an animated discussion about our non existent sex life. We still sleep in the same bed but for more than half our married life have not had sex, in fact the last time was over ten years ago. It only bothers her if she thinks I am getting it elsewhere but she does not regard it as important. Its for procreation and that's it.

I have a wide circle of friends, none of whom know of my involvement with the ladies I meet here, and that circle includes several ladies whom I find attractive and I think some of them have a notion for me too. Some are married, not many, most are single and they range in age from half my age to older than me.

I think I am friendly, gregarious and able to talk to anyone about any topic and have them feel comfortable in my company.

My point is, and here's where I need advice, should I grab the bull by the horns and just tell some of these female friends that I would like to take them to bed if they were open to some NSA fun. How would some of you ladies respond if you were presented with this question and what would be the best words to use.

My thoughts are to meet them for coffee and just get to the point at some stage and just say it if the vibes were right.

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Don't do it man.
If there was some requited chemistry with these other women, you would know and not be asking the question here.

Stick to the ladies here, you might think its more economical to have an affair, but It will cost you more in the long run.

Thanks for the time you have all taken to express your opinions, its exactly what I wanted and its good to see a well mannered, reasonable debate, with the odd deviation thrown in for good measure. I suspect I am not alone in my thoughts on the matter so if its helped anyone else then that's a bonus.

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Originally Posted by Bogman

Life has been very hectic of late and posed me many challenges both in my home life, my health and those around me and in my work but am beginning to see light at the end of the tunnel.

Recently my wife and I had an animated discussion about our non existent sex life. We still sleep in the same bed but for more than half our married life have not had sex, in fact the last time was over ten years ago. It only bothers her if she thinks I am getting it elsewhere but she does not regard it as important. Its for procreation and that's it.

I have a wide circle of friends, none of whom know of my involvement with the ladies I meet here, and that circle includes several ladies whom I find attractive and I think some of them have a notion for me too. Some are married, not many, most are single and they range in age from half my age to older than me.

I think I am friendly, gregarious and able to talk to anyone about any topic and have them feel comfortable in my company.

My point is, and here's where I need advice, should I grab the bull by the horns and just tell some of these female friends that I would like to take them to bed if they were open to some NSA fun. How would some of you ladies respond if you were presented with this question and what would be the best words to use.

My thoughts are to meet them for coffee and just get to the point at some stage and just say it if the vibes were right.

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Have your divorce papers drawn up and ready to sign if you go down that road .

I think it would be terribly foolish to take your extracurricular activities so close to home .

Are there not enough lovelies to satisfy you as is ??

Or you looking for the extra 'Thrill' of might be getting caught , of might destroying your life ??

Remember : she'll take half , no ?? X

Then again you only live once, as Del Boy says " who dares wins"

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Originally Posted by SophieX

She tells me a different story, she's probably just playing hard to get, don't tell her i told you.... :rolleyes:

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I've sent u my cock picture

Your opinion will change when you open it

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Originally Posted by SophieX

Thats a hen you divvy.... :D

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You're just trying to ruffle my feathers ,aren't you ?

None of the ladies I am thinking of are in any way connected to my wife, they are all friends of mine only and none have ever met her either. I am unable to father any children due to medical reasons so no risk of a pregnancy.

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Originally Posted by Irish Josephine

Some people do love risk taking and the thrill of maybe being caught.
I think being discovered visting Escorts is enough of a shock fot any wife but at least only her husband is guilty and she can turn to her friends for support.
Discovering your so called friend betrayed you and wondering how many knew is too cruel.
How much damage can be caused is worth considering, money can not be the only consideration.

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Originally Posted by SophieX

you've had enough pics.... :o

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I have a quota to fill you know.

Nearly have the wall of my bedroom covered now

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Originally Posted by SophieX

I daren't ask with what..... :vomit:

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Stalactites from the ceiling!

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Originally Posted by SophieX

You're sicker than i thought..... :indifferent:

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Your opinion can only get better from here on in

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Originally Posted by Bogman

Life has been very hectic of late and posed me many challenges both in my home life, my health and those around me and in my work but am beginning to see light at the end of the tunnel.

Recently my wife and I had an animated discussion about our non existent sex life. We still sleep in the same bed but for more than half our married life have not had sex, in fact the last time was over ten years ago. It only bothers her if she thinks I am getting it elsewhere but she does not regard it as important. Its for procreation and that's it.

I have a wide circle of friends, none of whom know of my involvement with the ladies I meet here, and that circle includes several ladies whom I find attractive and I think some of them have a notion for me too. Some are married, not many, most are single and they range in age from half my age to older than me.

I think I am friendly, gregarious and able to talk to anyone about any topic and have them feel comfortable in my company.

My point is, and here's where I need advice, should I grab the bull by the horns and just tell some of these female friends that I would like to take them to bed if they were open to some NSA fun. How would some of you ladies respond if you were presented with this question and what would be the best words to use.

My thoughts are to meet them for coffee and just get to the point at some stage and just say it if the vibes were right.

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If you are taking medication then stop,if not then consider starting.


(no offence meant but that is not the post of a sane man)