Your all heart Mellors my man lol
CG
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A marriage is like a jig saw puzzle. Without all the pieces in place it is nothing. Have you ever tried to move a completed jig saw without damaging it? Be careful what you do ......
Wow Ric!!! I'm the last person to give advice on marriage, but I must say I envy you! The fact that you and your wife can actually openly discuss your sexual fantasies (involving others) is amazing. I'm sure there are people who go right through life without ever being able to discuss their fantasies with their spouse. In my humble opinion thats a sign of true honesty and openess in your relationship! Major bonus!! A great starting point.
There has been a bit of critism about your title thread 'saving my relationship' but I think I know what you mean. Correct me if I'm wrong but you're talking about sex in your relationship i.e. losing the excitement etc.. that you used to have. A common problem in all long term realtionships. I am still amazed and so impressed that the two of you can be so honest and open with each other.
In the light of this, I think you have nothing to fear. Just continue your open discussion, let her know your fears and find out what she wants. Then go for it! If she wants to be alone with the male escort for the first time then so be it. Ask to tell you about it after and see if it turn s your on or has the opposite effect. That will probably let you know whether you'be be happy for her to see a male escort again but with you present.
As for you not being able to satisfy her in the future or her always longing for another man - I don't think this will add to the problem but probably solve it!? This is a diversion for the both of you not reality. You see escorts for the very same reason I suppose? i.e. that you need something different even though you still love and enjoy having sex with your wife.
Whatever you decide to do, just continue those open honest conversations with your wife. I think thats the key in any relationship whether its to do with sex or anything else.