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Thread: sex :PP

  1. #1
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    Default sex :PP

    Two women are chatting in an office.

    Woman 1: "I had sex last night, did you?"

    Woman 2: "Yes."

    Woman 1: "Was it good?"

    Woman 2: "No, it was a disaster... my husband came home, ate his dinner in three minutes, got on top of me, finished having sex in five minutes, rolled over and fell asleep in two minutes. How was yours?"

    Woman 1: "Oh it was amazing! My husband came home and took me out to a romantic dinner. After dinner we walked for an hour. When we came home he lit the candles around the house and we had an hour of foreplay. We then had an hour long session of fantastic sex and afterwards talked for an hour. It was like a fairytale!"

    At the same time, their husbands are talking at work.

    Husband 1: "You wanted sex last night, how was it?"

    Husband 2: "Great. I came home, dinner was on the table, I ate, had sex with my wife and fell asleep. It was great! What about you?"

    Husband 1: "It was horrible. I came home, there's no dinner because they cut the electricity because I hadn't paid the bill; so I had to take my wife out to dinner which was so expensive that I didn't have money left for a cab. We had to walk home which took an hour - and when we got home I remembered there was no electricity so I had to light candles all over the house! I was so angry that I couldn't get it up for an hour and then I couldn't climax for another hour. After I finally did, I was so aggravated that I couldn't fall asleep and my wife was jabbering away for another hour!"

    gigity gigity gigity ooooooooh right! lol

  2. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to mer For This Useful Post:

    Devil_Angel (18-06-11), dr love (18-06-11), Fitzy (18-06-11), kidkool (18-06-11), lovethegirls (18-06-11), Escort Advertiserpatty (18-06-11)

  3. #2
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    Default

    Fair play to ya mer .: doc
    Never mistake kindness for weakness .: doc

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to dr love For This Useful Post:

    mer (18-06-11)

  5. #3
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    Default

    I was having sex the other day, banging away, when suddenly I stopped mid-thrust and stood really still.

    "What are you doing?"

    "Something I learnt from online porn. It's called 'buffering'."


  6. #4
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    Very good woop woop
    “Once Everton has touched you nothing will be the same”
    Alan Ball


    Justice For The 96

  7. The Following User Says Thank You to lovethegirls For This Useful Post:

    mer (18-06-11)

  8. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by lovethegirls View Post
    Very good woop woop
    lol woop woop woop hahah

  9. The Following User Says Thank You to mer For This Useful Post:

    lovethegirls (18-06-11)

  10. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by mer View Post
    I was having sex the other day, banging away, when suddenly I stopped mid-thrust and stood really still.

    "What are you doing?"

    "Something I learnt from online porn. It's called 'buffering'."

    Time for some reviews from ya then .: lol
    Never mistake kindness for weakness .: doc

  11. The Following User Says Thank You to dr love For This Useful Post:

    mer (18-06-11)

  12. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by dr love View Post
    Time for some reviews from ya then .: lol
    Cant wait for them doc
    “Once Everton has touched you nothing will be the same”
    Alan Ball


    Justice For The 96

  13. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by lovethegirls View Post
    Cant wait for them doc
    They would be worth reading I'll give ya that ltg .: lol
    Never mistake kindness for weakness .: doc

  14. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by dr love View Post
    They would be worth reading I'll give ya that ltg .: lol
    Could make or break the lady in question
    “Once Everton has touched you nothing will be the same”
    Alan Ball


    Justice For The 96

  15. The Following User Says Thank You to lovethegirls For This Useful Post:

    mer (18-06-11)

  16. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by lovethegirls View Post
    Could make or break the lady in question
    Pmsl at that ltg .: doc
    Never mistake kindness for weakness .: doc

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