Dear Ladies of E-I,
For the past day or two I have had a mad horn on me, so much so that I am determined to score with one of you in the next week or so. I have been saving up my nuts like a good squirrel - err, mouse - for the past while and am anxious to mate with a beautiful woman again. It will involve my sparkling wit, my bulging wallet, and my micropenis which I guarantee you will only be able to vaguely feel. I only splurge once per appointment and I like snuggles. In short, I am an escort's dream client.
Please keep an eye on your inboxes for my enquiry.