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Thread: Worshipping in the temple of E-I

  1. #1
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    Default Worshipping in the temple of E-I

    Part 1

    The High Priestess, Queen of Tarts, Patricia created a Google temple called Escort Ireland, where beautiful ladies from all over the world, such as Alyssa, Lynne or Taylor of Manchester could announce their availability for companionship to the horny male population of a sexually repressed, Catholic Church controlled, country.
    She was ably assisted by the always horny, Doozer proking, Nicole, Natasha and QueenBee, but the situation got really hot when Super Swinger and Vampire, Jackie arrived with her comfy lilypad partner, Samlad, and Charlie from Escort Scotland.

    The pride of the worshippers is Anon361, an ExperiencedPunter who, it has been claimed has Big Paws and also, allegedly, a WellHungChap with 10inchesandcounting, which may be confirmed by Brenda, a beauty and a babe, Heidi, or Naomi. Luther is the wise old Monkeynut, with adogwithabone called Rover, who had one Elle of a passion for Yasmina’s luscious bum.

    Dr. Love is a Medicine Man, who has to mend the hearts broken by Emma Sweet and Jack Daniel loving Nick 2010, for the likes of Feargal, who kept saying TakemedrunkImhome in a Lincoln town car, and Mark444 who sang Dannyboy10 times or there’s only one Dave1Dave, depending on his mood, with BigPaul on the Banjo and BigTym acting all Victor Mature.

    ElGordo is the Magicalman who wanted to live TheCelticDream with Anna23, while Stella massaged his T_Tronic. The Lord of the manor, AlecHoran, hoped that someday he would find some LibertyLove, for his hamster friend Mousey, with Dolly Darling but, alas, he must dreamon.

    Kelso liked Alice with her legswideopen and asked “Can I lickyourclit and stick my oneeyedriley in your JimmyDee?” to which she replied, “Yes, if you can get your willyup”. Fitzy was a city gent who wantedthebest69 from Fiona, while Agniezka indulged in some 69 with Patrick69, watched by another Trugent, Sexyfukka who was the Real Deal, just like Zoobanzoo and Scankman.

    The Godess Shirley took Mr Pinky out to show Rayden, who was standing with his Wingman, Monster_Monster, with warmcome and Anita Sizzle as an optional extra. Benin, the blackcat, had biscuits for Irish Ciara and Alex, but they preferred Layercake from the Hobbyist.

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  3. #2
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    Part 2

    The Highwayman found a Donegal Angel in the crypt, and was just about to Quarterpoundher, when John Rambo and Dirty Harry came to the rescue while the Milf Hunter, Mellors, was being seduced by Mature Abby and Uk Heather.

    Duo specialist, Bruce Almighty, was refereeing a tug-of-war, with Blonde Chick Nikky and Eve on one side and Spanish Carmen and Malena on the other, when ChiefHandker came over, winked and said “you just have to lovethegirls”.

    Rodney and Scotus thought all nicegirlsarenice, but ladiesman, Morpheus just wanted to get down and dirty with Vanessa Vanny, JessicaJessy and Lisa007, but notatwork. The lasttime PetetheDub, a D4head, went McLooking for Denise, he was told by Blonde Alexa that he was no longer the Bhoywonder.

    Mr Fussy, the legend, was a RodeoMan, who liked to click n’pick a variety from Sexy Lady, Anny Mary to TS Laura Boldrini. Skywalker85 told KittyThai, “It’s time now to shake and vac my MrGear with Volvic11” and Patty Baby asked Bruno69, “Would you like a bit of headlad?”

    The Iceman, Daithi Mac, was always saying “IamSimonTemplar” when, in truth, he was a really Mr Shy, prickly, hairy man called Rooney. John Connor and a happygolucky, Franken996 wanted to set up SweetHomes with Tiffany Tees and Sandy69, providing honest fare, that included Brown Sugar from Sexy Cindy.

    KSteve, ThomasJ and Pablo23 were debating the merits of a visit to Bebitza, while Ebony Amber was playing Rockymunky with CoolJay. Amy Alison was discussing Freud with Aml, Apollo1 and Robintje when Kelly Curvy Babe hit Slimjim with a HD7055, Bacman36, Bodkin, as Eikalove4u and Jessie hosed Scatlover down.

    There was a WestCorkLad called Westside(x), aka Tommy Singh, who got lost on the N73 on the way to the wedding of Sweet Rachel and her Topgun, HornyLimerick, with best man Poggo, who had a FishermanSoul. Thankfully, he was set on the right track by another Corkpunter, Jamescork who got directions from a KerryLadintown.

    The honeymoon was scheduled to be on Capt. Jack Sparrow’s ship, The Alicia Sexy, setting sail to Hawaii with a crew consisting of fine English ladies, Taylor and Rebecca, and Celtic brethren Jessica James and Naughty Natalie, until Community Union Representatives, Lucy Chambers, Violette, AnDon, Ber and Brother Carlos Marvado scuppered their plans. They made them walk steady on a NinebyThree plank smeared with WD40, until they became lonely, punterminator’s, tied to a cable87 metres below the waterline.

    Jasmin was the pretty woman who finally found RicHardgear, a Dark Knight, to take her home to the Brazilian Rain Forrest with Princess Layla, and live happily ever after.

    God Bless Auntie Pat

    Here endeth the lesson.
    Last edited by Forrest; 14-04-11 at 16:13.

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  5. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Forrest View Post
    Part 1

    The High Priestess, Queen of Tarts, Patricia created a Google temple called Escort Ireland, where beautiful ladies from all over the world, such as Alyssa, Lynne or Taylor of Manchester could announce their availability for companionship to the horny male population of a sexually repressed, Catholic Church controlled, country.
    She was ably assisted by the always horny, Doozer proking, Nicole, Natasha and QueenBee, but the situation got really hot when Super Swinger and Vampire, Jackie arrived with her comfy lilypad partner, Samlad, and Charlie from Escort Scotland.

    The pride of the worshippers is Anon361, an ExperiencedPunter who, it has been claimed has Big Paws and also, allegedly, a WellHungChap with 10inchesandcounting, which may be confirmed by Brenda, a beauty and a babe, Heidi, or Naomi. Luther is the wise old Monkeynut, with adogwithabone called Rover, who had one Elle of a passion for Yasmina’s luscious bum.

    Dr. Love is a Medicine Man, who has to mend the hearts broken by Emma Sweet and Jack Daniel loving Nick 2010, for the likes of Feargal, who kept saying TakemedrunkImhome in a Lincoln town car, and Mark444 who sang Dannyboy10 times or there’s only one Dave1Dave, depending on his mood, with BigPaul on the Banjo and BigTym acting all Victor Mature.

    ElGordo is the Magicalman who wanted to live TheCelticDream with Anna23, while Stella massaged his T_Tronic. The Lord of the manor, AlecHoran, hoped that someday he would find some LibertyLove, for his hamster friend Mousey, with Dolly Darling but, alas, he must dreamon.

    Kelso liked Alice with her legswideopen and asked “Can I lickyourclit and stick my oneeyedriley in your JimmyDee?” to which she replied, “Yes, if you can get your willyup”. Fitzy was a city gent who wantedthebest69 from Fiona, while Agniezka indulged in some 69 with Patrick69, watched by another Trugent, Sexyfukka who was the Real Deal, just like Zoobanzoo and Scankman.

    The Godess Shirley took Mr Pinky out to show Rayden, who was standing with his Wingman, Monster_Monster, with warmcome and Anita Sizzle as an optional extra. Benin, the blackcat, had biscuits for Irish Ciara and Alex, but they preferred Layercake from the Hobbyist.
    Very clever! Well done

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    Forrest (14-04-11)

  7. #4
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    lol brilliant....

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    Forrest (14-04-11)

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    Quite Brilliant.

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    Forrest (14-04-11)

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    great read forrest
    Want to see my X rated content? Come join here - https://www.escortfans.com/ebony-amber-xxx

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    Forrest (14-04-11)

  13. #7
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    Very Funny Forrest
    Well done
    Join the E-I Fantasy Football League

    http://www.escort-ireland.com/boards...ntasy-Football

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    Forrest (14-04-11)

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    Must be a record of how many usernames are there
    Also brilliant and funny

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    Forrest (14-04-11)

  17. #9
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    Brilliant post Forrest, last time I tried that I had to explain to the person what had happened

    https://www.escort-ireland.com/board...ad.php?t=62398

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    Forrest (14-04-11)

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    I was getting worried towards the end that you didnt like me...sob sob... But then I saw Lucy was after me so I was dead chuffed...

    Who's a clever boy then...lol.

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    Forrest (14-04-11)

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