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Thread: I joined a Gym today. Bloody hell !!!!!!

  1. #1
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    Default I joined a Gym today. Bloody hell !!!!!!

    So for the first time I have joined a Gym.
    I decided it's about time I start to do some maintenance.

    So in I go today for an assessment, well fuck me sideways with a dumbell !!
    They tried to kill me.
    So my "trainer" ( A very fit looking young lady, who smelt of a mixture of Clorine and Timotei.) sat me down and went through my details. Weighed me, measured me and pronounced I have a BMI of 20.1.
    I asked if that meant I had the body of a 20 year old !! To which she laughed (cow) and said no but it was within the good zone.

    So we then proceded into the fitness area.
    I must say at this stage I was feeling good about myself, and was even toying with the idea that I was going to impress this girl.
    I had told her that I mountain bike regularly, so she put me on the spin bike first.
    That went great, she cranked the resistance up an up, not a bother, hardly broke a sweat.
    Next the tread mill, that too went well. Faster and faster, steeper and steeper.
    She nodded approvingly and took her notes. (Probably putting me down as a possible candidate to be a personal trainer for the gym)

    This is when she brought me over to what could only be discribed as torture racks, machines designed to humiliate and subdue even the most eager of people.
    Why would I even want to try and get my leg to touch my shoulder ?
    I've been perfectly happy all my life not being able to do the splits ! Why oh why would they make a machine that tries to pull your legs apart like the wish bone in a chicken ?
    I felt like I was visiting a gynecologist.
    I left with my head held low.
    So I have my programme, a list of tortures that I am to follow.

    But for now I think the fetal position on the couch

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  3. #2
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    Ah come on ... You will do great!

    You are in great shape

    Now keep doing the good work, never mind the chicken part. It will help you to get even more gorgeous :-)

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    dave1dave (27-01-11)

  5. #3

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    Hope you didn't pay for the year up front. More than likely you will go a handful of times and then never go again

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    dave1dave (27-01-11)

  7. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lou Cefer View Post
    Hope you didn't pay for the year up front. More than likely you will go a handful of times and then never go again
    No just paying month by month a little more expensive but not tied into anything.

  8. #5
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    Joined a Gym once and lasted a week. Hope you stay longer than me.

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    dave1dave (27-01-11)

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    Thumbs up

    First couple off sessions are hard but it does get easier stick at it it's an investment for the future.

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  12. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by nick2010 View Post
    Ah come on ... You will do great!

    You are in great shape

    Now keep doing the good work, never mind the chicken part. It will help you to get even more gorgeous :-)
    lol thanks Nick, I'll have to arrange some post workout appointments with you. That might keep me going.

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  14. #8
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    Trust me when that 12 pack arrives, it is so hard to get back to that 6 pack.
    Who am I kidding, never had a 6 pack to start off with, ah but to dream!

    Keep up with the work, you will feel better for it.

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  16. #9
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    Try and incorporate some weight training as well. Bench press, curls etc…. You can still lose weight doing weights and get encouragement when you eventually see the results. I got despondent years ago doing just cardio cos my beer investment is only going to go so far to a six-pack unless I give up the gargle. But to see the upper half expand and increase, therefore minimizing the bulging belly, gave me incentive. I now find something missing in my life without my gym fix..

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    dave1dave (27-01-11)

  18. #10
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    Stick with it Dave - it becomes addictive and you will find your energy levels increase daramatically - I am sure you will find an outlet for all that extra energy.

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