Wayne Rooney's been arrested for shoplifting a packet of Cherry Bakewells.
He explained to police that he'd promised Coleen never to pay for another tart again.
Wayne Rooney's been told to take a long look at himself in the mirror. Like that's going to cheer him up.
Some of Wayne Rooney's sponsors are sticking by him.
Spokesmen from Durex, Yellow Pages and Travelodge insisted he'd done absolutely nothing wrong