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Thread: Chuck Norris Is there anything he cant do

  1. #1
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    Default Chuck Norris Is there anything he cant do



    Even his pets are HARD
    Join the E-I Fantasy Football League

    http://www.escort-ireland.com/boards...ntasy-Football

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    Didnt he spar bruce lee and get his ass kicked,ther he cant beat bruce lee
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    Quote Originally Posted by WD-40 View Post
    Didnt he spar bruce lee and get his ass kicked,ther he cant beat bruce lee
    yeah, I remember that....was it Way Of The Dragon? Anyway, all I remember was Norris was covered in hair and for some reason there was a cat walking around during the fight.


    Quality stuff
    Last edited by blankmannn; 04-11-09 at 19:08. Reason: spelling error

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    There is no Theory of Evolution. There is only a list of animals that Chuck Norris allows to live.

    Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.

    Chuck Norris destroyed the Periodic Table, because he only recognises the element of Surprise.

    Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

    Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

    Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

    The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

    When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.

    Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.

    There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Chuck Norris lives in Oklahoma.

    When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

    If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Chuck Norris could ever fight himself, he'd win.

    Fear is not the only emotion Chuck Norris can smell. He can also detect hope, as in "I hope I don't get a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris."

    AND FINALLY...

    Mr. T is not really black. It's just that the sun is afraid to shine on him.


  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by doozer121 View Post


    Even his pets are HARD
    Ouch! that hurt.
    Once a prick - always a prick.

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    he cant fucking act.

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    Quote Originally Posted by anonymouse View Post
    Chuck Norris destroyed the Periodic Table, because he only recognises the element of Surprise.



    I heard he can bring down a plane by pointing at the sky and shouting "BANG!"

    I also heard he can slam a revolving door

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    Quote Originally Posted by alechoran View Post
    he cant fucking act.
    COURSE HA CAN FUCKIN ACT,HAVE YOU NOT SEEN WALKER TEXAS RANGER
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    Quote Originally Posted by WD-40 View Post
    COURSE HA CAN FUCKIN ACT,HAVE YOU NOT SEEN WALKER TEXAS RANGER
    he might not be able to act but I heard he contracted cancer and then cured it by smoking 20 smokes a day and flexing his biceps, no chimo

  10. #10
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    What a great guy
    mam mammy mam mam mam mammy

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