I decided to go for a quiet half dozen in my local this afternoon. I couldn't help overhear these two lads discussing escorts ie rates, times, location etc. I was almost tempted to give my tuppence worth but realised that my identity would be revealed.

A clue to the two lads, I was the chap two stools down to you on your right, drinking Guinness, farting and smoking Benson and Hedges outside.