There Once Was An Escort.....

[Liz McDonald]

Hey theres also a bad client section. We all know how discreet she is :

http://www.independentdubaiescorts.com/bad-clients.htm

[sexonlegs]

There once was an escort called Lizzy
Who talked loadsa bullshit till she got dizzy

She was banned off site as a bigmouthed bitch
And reading all her shite gents gave her a ditch


Her 'wonder worked out' quite,
as she ate her own shite
and no one want to shag her ever since.........


...........not that there was a big queue anyway

There is an old slapper called Anna
Who always wore a bandanna

The men that came to visit
Stayed no more than just a minute

As those pictures were sure not of Anna

[rover]

A money grabbing escort named Sue,
once filled her Vagina with glue,
she said with a grin,
"since they pay to get in,
they can pay to get out of it too"!!

There is a Goddess who has me in bits (you know whats cumming next)
I'd dearly love to suck her big tits.
I must make a point to stay in her good grace,
because I'd love her to sit on my face.
Finally, when I cum up from Co. Louth,
I'd love her to piss in my mouth.

(Hope that wasn't too vulgar).

[Liz McDonald]

There is an old slapper called Liz Hilton
Who always drank Milton

The men who came to visit got the shock of their lives.
She threatened to expose their rendevous to their wives.

Those pictures were all re-touched, no thanks I'll pass.
And they got the shock of their lives when they saw saggy tits and saggy ass

[experienced punter]

There once was a man called Dave
Who kept a dead whore in his cave
You must admit
She smelled like shit
But imagine the money he saved

[experienced punter]

There once was an escort from Crewe
Who said as the Bishop withdrew
The Vicar is slicker
and quicker and thicker
and 12 inches longer than you

[sexonlegs]

There once was an escort called Lizzy
Who came on here and got herself in a right tizzy

She thought causing drama would impress
And cause Irish men to want her to undress

But it didn't work and her phone still isn't very busy

A very long time ago there was an escort called Pat
Who now runs an escort site for those that want a bit of this and that

Unfortuately though it seems as though
Nobody cares, so thats that

[experienced punter]

There was a young woman from Ealing
Who had a peculiar feeling
She laid on her back
Opened her crack
And pissed all over the ceiling

[sexonlegs]

There is an old slapper called Liz Hilton
Who always drank Milton

The men who came to visit got the shock of their lives.
She threatened to expose their rendevous to their wives.

Those pictures were all re-touched, no thanks I'll pass.
And they got the shock of their lives when they saw saggy tits and saggy ass

There is an old slapper called Liz McDonald
Who thought that there really was a Ronald McDonald

The sad thing of it all is that she doesn't exist at all

Its a soap character not anyone real at all

[LLAMEDOS]

So that saggy arse slapper called Liz,
plans to go to Dubai on "business",
dunno what she`s in mind
cos Arabs aint blind
and they`ll give her a bit of a miss.

Liz will return all down in the mouth
hopefully though not to County Louth,
She will be wondering why
nobody gave her a try
cos her titties and bum have gone South !

In an effort to restore her pride,
She`ll attempt her wrinkles to hide,
but its not her skin
or her anger within
tis her Fanny that is just too wide. -- he he !