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Thread: Safety net!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Posts
    301

    Exclamation Safety net!

    Worst nightmare...meet your sister in law, who's out for a lunchtime jog, as you are entering an apartment block in D2. ( you work in D14)

    "Hey Calv, what are up doing round here?"

    Blood drains from face, palpitations, knees wobble, start stuttering, loose control of bladder....NO.

    You have an excuse at the ready. Here's some suggestions:

    I'm picking up a box set of DVDs I saw on Adverts

    Sorry can't talk, catching a Pokèmon

    Please keep this quite, I'm visiting a counsellor.

    Getting a colonic, IBS don't you know.

    Buying hash

    Lost my cards this morning and a guy phoned who found them, lives here.



    Be prepared...Don't get caught!

  2. The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to Calvados For This Useful Post:

    funlover12 (12-07-16), joggon (13-07-16), LuckyLu (13-07-16), Nicolle (13-07-16), tatoo (13-07-16), TonyB (13-07-16)

  3. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
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    Default

    Was expecting a tale of woe here..

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to Pinkeye For This Useful Post:


  5. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    10,794
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Calvados View Post
    Worst nightmare...meet your sister in law, who's out for a lunchtime jog, as you are entering an apartment block in D2. ( you work in D14)

    "Hey Calv, what are up doing round here?"

    Blood drains from face, palpitations, knees wobble, start stuttering, loose control of bladder....NO.

    You have an excuse at the ready. Here's some suggestions:

    I'm picking up a box set of DVDs I saw on Adverts

    Sorry can't talk, catching a Pokèmon

    Please keep this quite, I'm visiting a counsellor.

    Getting a colonic, IBS don't you know.

    Buying hash

    Lost my cards this morning and a guy phoned who found them, lives here.



    Be prepared...Don't get caught!
    or the alternative porn version

    " hey calv what you doing round here?"

    "meeting a friend.."

    "oh me too, hang on my phone..."

    "ok Im here..."

    "calv? "

    " fuck!"

    "awkward hmmmm well you know I kinda fancy you dont you "

    "no just thought you were flirting "

    "hey we both know each others secrets here, so lets just fuck anyway!"

    *minutes later*

    * bed post noises against wall*

    *smoke lit pillow talk *

    "Im so glad we did that, the arse on you gawwwd all those guilty wanks over the years "

    "oh kevin "

    "its calv remember

  6. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to funlover12 For This Useful Post:

    Bobbi (13-07-16), Calvados (12-07-16), Nicolle (13-07-16)

  7. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Posts
    301

    Default

    Very good...in my dreams!

  8. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Posts
    6,127
    Blog Entries
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    Default

    I always just smile laugh and go a sure I'm meeting a man about a dog and I change the line of questioning at the person why you here then talk shite

    I said it before ye lot make shit hookers

  9. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to annabel taylor For This Useful Post:

    Calvados (12-07-16), joggon (13-07-16), Prickly (13-07-16)

  10. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Posts
    5,434
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    Just delivering a load to the girls upstairs.
    My wife caught me wearing ladies underwear and threatened to leave me.
    So I packed up all her clothes
    And left.

  11. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to philipkntz For This Useful Post:

    funlover12 (13-07-16), TonyB (13-07-16)

  12. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
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    Quote Originally Posted by philipkntz View Post
    Just delivering a load to the girls upstairs.
    "its the cream in this weather, it wont keep so they have to keep getting more delivered"

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