Back after a long absence, I did my homework, and one after another, tried to book 3 of the hottest most 5 star reviewed ladies on this site. Please bear in mind, I love girls, I adore escorts and I am pleasant and respectful to a point barely short of being obsequious.

Lovely Lady No 1: Invited PM's, so I sent her one asking about a particular service. Still no response at all 3 weeks later.

Lovely Lady No 2: Rang, and was answered with what sounded like a fairly cool & wary tone. I don't blame her - if I looked half as good as her I'd be wary too! But it got gradually cooler and ruder, not better. When I asked her to clarify exactly which of her "favourites" she considered to be extras (a total nonsense in itself), and what the extra charge would be, she became totally evasive to the point where I foolishly gave in and said we'd sort it out when I got there. I had already mentioned a specific date and time, but when I confirmed the booking and asked her to do likewise, she would only say that I should phone 30 minutes before I wanted to meet her. I explained that I couldn't possibly drive halfway across the country to get to a point within 30 minutes of her, only to risk her being unavailable when I got there, but she refused to confirm the booking and eventually hung up on me.

Lovely Lady No 3: Answered phone nicely, but with sounds of people talking in the background (or radio / TV - I couldn't tell for sure) to the extent that I couldn't hear her properly, and was never sure if she was talking to me or someone in the room. I said this to her and got no response, so I struggled on and made a booking. I then said I had a couple of requests which was answered with an extremely rudely barked. "Be quick I have an appointment", so I let her go. Texted her immediately afterwards, stupidly apologising for interrupting her, explained that I needed to ask her a couple of things and told her what they were, and that she could call me back any time, or let me know when would suit her for me to call her. No response. Texted again 24 hours later explaining that I had to cancel if I couldn't speak to her. No response. Texted again a few hours after that to cancel. No response.

Lads, I am genuinely pleased for the thousands of you that have endured this type of appalling treatment and had a fantastic experience with these ladies. There must be close to 1,000 5 star reviews between the 3 of them on this site. But why do you let them away with it? No way would I ever hand a couple of hundred quid to someone who was that discourteous to me at the booking stage. Until I left the Irish scene about 10 years ago, I never had a single experience like this.