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Thread: When is an appointment actually an appointment?

  1. #1
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    Question When is an appointment actually an appointment?

    OK, so we know what an appointment is its 's arrangement to meet someone at a particular time and place.

    So say I discuss today on the phone or via PM with a lady about an appointment for say tomorrow evening at 9pm and I'm told that 9pm is perfect and that she is looking forward to seeing me at that time. She then tells me to ring her and confirm the appointment at 8pm, one hour before the appointment.

    This "conformation" makes sense if I have organised the appointment via PM as the lady gets to hear my voice and gain an insight into what I'm really like. It also goes some way to prove that I am still serious about the appointment and I am going to turn up.

    Now, my question is this: When is the appointment official? Is it when she tells me today "that 9pm is perfect and that she is looking forward to seeing me at that time" or is it when I ring her an hour before to "Confirm" the appointment?

    Some ladies ask you to ring half an hour before the appointment to confirm. If I had traveled a long distance and rang half an hour before only to be told that I could not see her at the previously agreed time and that I didn't have an official appointment until I confirmed it then TBH I probably would not be too happy!

    So should guys complain if a lady does not answer their phone when they are trying to "Confirm" an appointment? Is it really worth organising an appointment in advance if it means nothing until actually "Confirmed" and where the lady could just change her mind and not be available at the previously agreed time?

    My interpretation of the "conformation" call was to let the lady that everything was still OK on my side and that I would be keeping our appointment. But perhaps it is also the same for the lady and it is for her to let me know that everything was still OK on her side and that she would be keeping our appointment?

    So when is an appointment actually an appointment?



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    casman (24-09-15)

  3. #2

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    It's no big deal, she is more making sure from your side. It's quite normal in fact. She's not going to sit there waiting. She will use the hour to shower, hoover and dust, fresh towels, clean the jacks, change into something sexy or what you asked for and finally adopt the lotus position to be in a calm and relaxed state of mind

  4. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bedders View Post
    It's no big deal, she is more making sure from your side. It's quite normal in fact. She's not going to sit there waiting. She will use the hour to shower, hoover and dust, fresh towels, clean the jacks, change into something sexy or what you asked for and finally adopt the lotus position to be in a calm and relaxed state of mind
    I know the "conformation" call is normal and I wasn't asking what she was doing with her time. I was more asking should guys get upset when what that thought was an appointment never materialised because they could either not get through at the agreed time to "confirm" the appointment or where the lady has made different plans and informs the guy when he is trying to confirm that she can no longer see him at the previously agreed time?

    This seems to crop up a lot in the negative reviews — but should it?



  5. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Petros View Post
    I know the "conformation" call is normal and I wasn't asking what she was doing with her time. I was more asking should guys get upset when what that thought was an appointment never materialised because they could either not get through at the agreed time to "confirm" the appointment or where the lady has made different plans and informs the guy when he is trying to confirm that she can no longer see him at the previously agreed time?

    This seems to crop up a lot in the negative reviews — but should it?
    This really applies for a first time appointment. Once a lady knows I am not a messer and am respectful I hardly ever am asked to confirm.

    A first appointment is entirely different. The ladies are plagued with time wasters. Guys who book but have a last minute change of heart. It could be a guy gets nervous, doesn't like the look of the place or his guilt overcomes him. It must drive the girls mad. So it's understandable they request a confirmation a short time before the appointment.

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    It is a firm arrangement from the PM conversation, and if either party pulls out they are letting the other down.

    I totally understand the request for confirmation. No shows are a big waste of money. My guess is that the number of people who make the confirmation call and still no show is only a small fraction of total no shows, and at least the girl has a chance of a replacement booking, or can use the time, if the call does not come.

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  9. #6
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    I got a cancellation booking with the Nct the other day.
    I know it's not the same thing as what your talking about but I'm sure if a no show for an app with a lady cost the punter a few bob he wouldn't do it again.
    Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

  10. #7
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    Was heading through the town yesterday and decided to give a girl a call on the off chance she could see me and unfortunately she couldn't which i completely understood as she had an appointment in 20 minutes which she seemed very sure of and why wuldn't she,however 15 minutes later i get a call from her,saying she could see me as she hadn't received the the confirmation call,unfortunately i was nearly home and couldn't get back in,i felt she was really pissed off at the amount of times its happening as they are loosing out on business as a result.All the girl has is our word that we will confirm and arrive for the appointment on time,but as the OP said that has happened to me before too,where appointment was all arranged well in advance and confirmation call was made only when i arrived for precise location no answer as she took another booking and hoping i would wait around,unfortunately for her there was a hottie around the corner from her

  11. #8
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    I have often read here that forum posters are among the worst time wasters.
    If you are travelling a distance request the confirmation for maybe 90 mins before.
    My understanding is the appointment is only "official" after the confirmation.

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  13. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by MidlifeCrisis View Post
    It is a firm arrangement from the PM conversation, and if either party pulls out they are letting the other down.

    I totally understand the request for confirmation. No shows are a big waste of money. My guess is that the number of people who make the confirmation call and still no show is only a small fraction of total no shows, and at least the girl has a chance of a replacement booking, or can use the time, if the call does not come.
    That's that I'd like to think myself! But I'd be interested to hear from the ladies side — do they regard it the same way?

    Going back to my original scenario — I make an appointment for say tomorrow evening at 9pm and I'm told that 9pm is perfect and that she is looking forward to seeing me at that time. She then tells me to ring her and confirm the appointment at 8pm, one hour before the appointment tomorrow night.

    She then tomorrow gets someone looking for a dinner date tomorrow night. This is a 3 hour out call with dinner, very nice! So as I have not "confirmed" my appointment yet she takes the booking for the dinner date at 8pm. This client confirms at 7pm and off she goes.

    I then try to confirm my appointment at 8pm but she can't take my call.

    Now, has she done anything wrong? Technically I had not confirmed my appointment so did I really have an agreed appointment?

    I totally understand that if you don't confirm then you can forget about the appointment as the lady could make an appointment with someone else.



  14. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Petros View Post
    OK, so we know what an appointment is — its 's arrangement to meet someone at a particular time and place.

    So say I discuss today on the phone or via PM with a lady about an appointment for say tomorrow evening at 9pm and I'm told that 9pm is perfect and that she is looking forward to seeing me at that time. She then tells me to ring her and confirm the appointment at 8pm, one hour before the appointment.

    This "conformation" makes sense if I have organised the appointment via PM as the lady gets to hear my voice and gain an insight into what I'm really like. It also goes some way to prove that I am still serious about the appointment and I am going to turn up.

    Now, my question is this: When is the appointment official? Is it when she tells me today "that 9pm is perfect and that she is looking forward to seeing me at that time" or is it when I ring her an hour before to "Confirm" the appointment?

    Some ladies ask you to ring half an hour before the appointment to confirm. If I had traveled a long distance and rang half an hour before only to be told that I could not see her at the previously agreed time and that I didn't have an official appointment until I confirmed it then TBH I probably would not be too happy!

    So should guys complain if a lady does not answer their phone when they are trying to "Confirm" an appointment? Is it really worth organising an appointment in advance if it means nothing until actually "Confirmed" and where the lady could just change her mind and not be available at the previously agreed time?

    My interpretation of the "conformation" call was to let the lady that everything was still OK on my side and that I would be keeping our appointment. But perhaps it is also the same for the lady and it is for her to let me know that everything was still OK on her side and that she would be keeping our appointment?

    So when is an appointment actually an appointment?
    If I make a 'next day' appointment by PM,I usually text the next morning to confirm and then call (or text) to confirm at the requested time.Usually works for the lady.

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