Guess what’s in my Duffel Bag competition...

[Quarterpoundher]

This is for all my loyal Punters who have visited me here for some good old fashioned down home, rip roaring rural fun. Guess what’s in the Duffel Bag and the lucky lad (or Lassie) gets the full QP experience, at a 50% reduction (beat that Kat) and I mean full, My post op has gone better then expected and I am now in a position to offer TS services, I threw the quare fella to the three legged terrier just this morning, I’m not bragging but it should see him through the winter…

[skyblue41]

oh i'd guess a book of prose, a book of ' Carry On' style bawdy rhyming couplets, a printout of Dolly Darlings profile, waterproofs, a gargling bowl, litres of fresh spring water, a 'love is...' mug with a pic of westie. The bag probably doesnt contain any tickets to Croke Park as ye lads only travel for finals...

[Patricia]

Condoms (Ok the lady will have them, but no stud goes anywhere without these...)

A trench coat, false moustache and over-sized glasses in case you need to get past hotel security cameras or fear a Sunday World sting outside your escort's apartment.

A brown envelope stuffed full of fake 20 euro bills and 6 Dunkin’ Donuts in case the Guards turn up and you need to get rid of them quick smart.

A charming photo of your 3-legged dog to show the ladies (You've found they go the extra mile for you when they find out your a disabled dog carer...).

A Carl Douglas CD because you like to shag to "Kung Foo Fighting" but you've found the ladies don't always have your favourite song to hand (Honestly, if prostitution was legalised you are sure these problems would be resolved).

A nice pair of brand new size 10 knickers, because you always steal the ladies panties upon leaving so you've something to smell on the way home, but, cause you're a nice guy, you always leave them a new pair.

[Quarterpoundher]

Condoms (Ok the lady will have them, but no stud goes anywhere without these...)

A trench coat, false moustache and over-sized glasses in case you need to get past hotel security cameras or fear a Sunday World sting outside your escort's apartment.

A brown envelope stuffed full of fake 20 euro bills and 6 Dunkin’ Donuts in case the Guards turn up and you need to get rid of them quick smart.

A charming photo of your 3-legged dog to show the ladies (You've found they go the extra mile for you when they find out your a disabled dog carer...).

A Carl Douglas CD because you like to shag to "Kung Foo Fighting" but you've found the ladies don't always have your favourite song to hand (Honestly, if prostitution was legalised you are sure these problems would be resolved).

A nice pair of brand new size 10 knickers, because you always steal the ladies panties upon leaving so you've something to smell on the way home, but, cause you're a nice guy, you always leave them a new pair.

Re: Condons
I’m a TS now so no need for the 10-10-20’s, (type of fertilizer bag, that's what we call them here) and I only offer AWO.

Re: Disguise
That’s my normal attire

Re: Guards
I have an “understanding” with Ballygobackwards finest, we get along juuuuust fine (Wink wink nudge nudge)

Re: Dog
They forget all about the canine, when they see the Equine

Re: Knickers
You REALLY know me so well, and your right, I always leave a pair of tighty whiteys with the slogan :cumm again” on the front and “glad to see the back of ya” on the back

Re: Music
I have a selection of mood music tailored to the clients request.

Male Clients
Ace of Base – Don’t turn around
Aerosmith – Walk this way
Def Leppard – Make Love like a a Man
Bruce Springsteen – working on the Highway
Blackeyed Peas – Pump it

Female Clients
Bruce Springsteen - I’m goin’ down
Bruce Springsteen – Secret Garden
Bruce Springsteen – Tunnel of love
Dexy’s midnight runners – cum on Eileen
Dolly Parton – Here you cum again (I don’t like to brag…..but…)
E.M.F.- Your Unbelievable (Again, I don’t like to brag)
Fleetwood Mac – You make loving fun (seeing a pattern here?)

Fisting
All Saints – I know where its at
Aretha Franklin – I say a little prayer
Delta Goodrem – My big mistake

Fetish
Annie Lennox – Walking on Broken Glass
Bobby Brown – Don’t be cruel
Diana Ross – Upside down

Hardsports
Annie Lennox – Why
Atomic Kitten – Whole again
Backstreet Boys – I want it that way
Don Henley – Dirty Laundry


Sky Blue,

Like that, I support Waterford though, so you’re right, maybe this year. I won’t say if you got any, but your in the ballpark, you could well be in for a spin down the country…

YouTube - I Know Him So Well (Elaine Paige + Barbara Dickson)

[roryman]

This is for all my loyal Punters who have visited me here for some good old fashioned down home, rip roaring rural fun. Guess what’s in the Duffel Bag and the lucky lad (or Lassie) gets the full QP experience, at a 50% reduction (beat that Kat) and I mean full, My post op has gone better then expected and I am now in a position to offer TS services, I threw the quare fella to the three legged terrier just this morning, I’m not bragging but it should see him through the winter…

Now thats funny!

But its an easy one, seeing as you work for the forestry, it has to be logs!

[Quarterpoundher]

Sorry Rory, I don’t bring my work home with me, you’ll have to do better if you want a piece of me.

I actually mention one thing that I have in my workbag in a previous, recent enough post…

[roryman]

Shergar
The crew of the Mary Rose
Lord Lucan
The economy (It has to be somewhere!)
My left Foot
Modern Manners
Western Civilisation
The Missing Link
2 pubic hairs and a glass eye!

[Quarterpoundher]

We have a tie break situation folks, two have 1 item each currently, so if no-one beats that in the next day or so, I’m of to both the Queen of Tarts (Oh yes yes yes) to rock her house of cards to its very foundations or up North to explore Rorys Boyne valley (Oh no no no).

[Epsilon]

We have a tie break situation folks, two have 1 item each currently, so if no-one beats that in the next day or so, I’m of to both the Queen of Tarts (Oh yes yes yes) to rock her house of cards to its very foundations or up North to explore Rorys Boyne valley (Oh no no no).

well if you had the op and threw the lad to a 3 legged terrier, then the gonads have to be in the bag!!! You cant be carrying them around in you pocket..
And you probably have an industrial size atrixo there too, for those ham hocks protruding from your sleeves.
Is that 2??????

[Quarterpoundher]

well if you had the op and threw the lad to a 3 legged terrier, then the gonads have to be in the bag!!! You cant be carrying them around in you pocket..
And you probably have an industrial size atrixo there too, for those ham hocks protruding from your sleeves.
Is that 2??????

O.K. Its now turning into a gang bang, very funny Ep. But the lee roads headed north when they saw the surgeon gowning up, their somewhere around my ears and are not for being talked down. I got the Op done on the cheap in Thailand by backyard butcher. I may not be anatomically correct as such, but I’ve no problems accommodating the larger lads shall we say, but if your packing a pecker, you might as well be shagging a milk maids bucket for all the puchase your gonna get, now can’t fault my honesty as an Escort now lads can you. You qualify as your not to far out on the second. Close enough so here’s my cigar, whoops forgot the terrier is dining like a king on that at the mo.

PS

Your place or mine Epsilon?